


Steven Universe: With Spinel

by Goldude



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Canon-Typical Violence, Crystal Gem Spinel Au, Gen, Retelling, please comment
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:07:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 20,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27133621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Goldude/pseuds/Goldude
Summary: We...Are the Crystal Gems!We'll always save the day!And if you think we can't,We'll always find a way!That's why the people of this world... believe in...Garnet, Amethyst, Spinel, and Pearl... and Steven!
Relationships: Connie Maheswaran/Steven Universe, Rose Quartz/Greg Universe, Ruby/Sapphire (Steven Universe)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 34





	1. Gem Glow

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure if any of you want to read yet another Spinel is a Crystal Gem, AU, but here it is anyway. If you enjoy, please let me know if I should continue.

" **NOOOOOO**!" Steven Universe was not having a good day. "This can't be _happening_...!" He turned to face the two employees of the donut shop.

"This has to be a dream!" Steven ran over to Lars and hugged him, burying a cheek into the employee's back.

Lars groaned and shook Steven loose, letting him flop to the ground face-first. "Get off me man! I'm stocking here."

Sadie offered a sympathetic frown. "I'm sorry, Steven. I guess they stopped making them."

What Steven heard was unbelievable. "Stopped making them!?" Steven fixated his gaze on the empty Cookie Cat freezer. "Why in the world would they stop making Cookie Cats? They're only the most scrumptious and delicious ice-cream sandwich ever made! _Don't they have laws for this_!?"

"Tough bits, man," Lars said, restocking the shelves with donuts. "Nobody buys them anymore. I guess they couldn't compete with Lion Lickers."

Steven turned his attention to the most heinous crime anyone could ever imagine. "Not Lion Lickers. Nobody likes them! They don't even look like lions!" It was true. They're more like bears with afros that look dumb. "Kids these days..."

Lars grew a smirk and took this opportunity to mock Steven. "Well, if you miss your wimpy ice cream so much, why don't you make some with your magic belly button?" This went right over Steven's head.

"That's not how it works, Lars!" Steven thought for a second and lifted his shirt up, peering at his rose-red gem. "...Right?"

Hoping to somehow magically spawn a delicious Cookie Cat ice-cream sandwich, he smooshed his stomach together. Nothing happened. This made Steven have a sad. He walked over to the Cookie Cat freezer and started lamenting. "Oh, sweet Cookie Cats... with your crunchy cookie outside... and your icy creamy insides..."

To help pay respects, Steven drew a cat on the door. "You were too good for this world." Steven offered one final kiss and began solemnly hugging the freezer.

"Uh... Steven? Do you want to take the freezer with you?" Sadie questioned. Steve merely nodded.

* * *

Steven opened the door to his home, being certain that he was destined to be the one to bear the bad news. "Hey, guys! You won't believe-"

He got cut off by a black-and-green monster that looked like a giant centipede tackling him. A purple whip wrapped around the monster to save him, and its user, Amethyst, paused to casually wave to the poor boy. "Sup, Steven?"

The squat purple gem with long, white hair and wearing messy purple and black clothes then whipped the centipede monster into the air. It flew past another gem, this one white and wearing blue clothes. Pearl whipped her spear along gracefully, fighting almost as if this is a highly-choreographed ballet routine. One of the monsters got whipped into Garnet's gauntlet. The dark-red gem with the practical clothes and square-shaped afro (Steven likes this afro much better) quietly tore the monster in half, destroying it. As more approached, she punched them all away, one of them landing on Spinel's foot. Spinel, sporting an outfit that looked to be somewhere in between a jester costume and a royal dress and having round, poofy pigtails that tapered off into a spiral akin to a drill, then begun bouncing the centipede monster from foot to foot like it was a plaything and took immense delight doing so.

As all of that happened, Steven got up and carefully set down the Cookie Cat freezer on the nearby couch. "Awesome...! What are these things?"

"Sorry, Steven." Pearl picked up a centipede monster and hugged it close to herself to prevent it from escaping. "We'll get these centipeetles out of your room. We think they were trying to get into the temple."

"Aww," Steven sighed, "You don't have to get rid of them. They're really cool."

"And dangerous!" Spinel piped up, now spinning the centipeetle on a finger like a basketball. As if on cue, the centipeetle Pearl held shot a gunky pile of acid onto the floor, causing a hole to melt into it. 

Both Pearl and Spinel grimaced a little. "...Case in point."

Spinel went back to spinning her centipeetle around, being glared at by Pearl until Garnet punched it into nonexistence. Spinel shrugged, "What? It's not like any of these have gems."

Amethyst whipped a centipeetle into the wall, destroying it. Then started picking her nose. "...You know what, she's right!"

"That means there must be a mother somewhere nearby," Garnet deduced.

"We should probably find it before anyone gets hurt," Pearl warned.

Steven's eyes lit up. "Oh! Can I come? Can I, can I!?"

"Aww, lil' S," Spinel murmured, "Look, I hate to be a pill, but you don't have any gem powers. Ya gotta wait safely here 'till ya get some."

Pearl continued whilst snapping the neck of the centipeetle, "Until then, we'll take care of protecting humanity, okay?"

"Aw, man," Steven lamented. Just another day he wasn't allowed to do anything cool. Or helpful. Before Steven could lament too much, he spotted a centipeetle raiding the fridge and rushed over. "Hey! Get out of there! Go on! Shoo!"

As Steven approached, the centipeetle retreated. He surveyed the damage. "Aww, They got into everything! Not cool." As Steven did so, a giant pink hand slammed onto the centipeetle, causing it to unalive. 

Spinel grunts. "I just restocked five hours ago." Some foods looked like they were half-eaten and needed to be thrown out, some looked like they were only slightly damaged and thus salvageable, and some look untouched, like the Cookie Cat packages in the freezer.

Wait.

Steve's eyes lit up and he exhumed giddiness. "No way! It can't be! Where did you get these!? I thought they stopped making them!" Steven grabbed one of the Cookie Cat packages.

Spinel was the first to confirm. "They did. Understandably so."

Steven blinked. "What do you mean?"

"Weeeeeell," Spinel began, "First, there was the little yet long-lasting controversy that they contain trace amounts of lycasin. Then there's the whole employee restructuring and money mismanagement decades ago Bestle nevah really recovered from. Then about a year ago, there was the whole Lion Licker theme song contest that thousands of people submitted entries to, not ta mention the alternate reality game they started three days ago ta help promote Lion Lickers. Oh, and there's also the fact that Lion Lickers and Bestle are both subsidiaries of Kello-Mello, it's no wondah the higher-ups wanted to halt Cookie Cats."

The other gems and Steven stared blankly at Spinel for several seconds before Pearl cleared her throat. "An- anyways, since they're your favorite, we-"

"We went out and stole a bunch!" Amethyst piped up.

Pearl groaned. "I went back and paid for them."

"With the money I got from workin'," Spinel interjected, "Maybe you should get a job, too, Pearl."

"The whole thing was my idea," informed Garnet, retracting her gauntlets.

"It was everyone's idea," Amethyst said.

"Not really," Garnet rebutted.

"Knock it off, you two. All that matters is that lil' S is happy."

How happy? "Oooooooooh," Steven began, singing.

♪ He's a frozen treat with an all new taste! ♪  
♪ 'Cause he came to this planet from outer space! ♪  
♪ A refugee of an interstellar war! ♪  
♪ But now he's at your local grocery store! ♪  
♪ Cookie Cat! He's a pet for your tummy! ♪  
♪ Cookie Cat! He's super duper yummy! ♪  
♪ Cookie Cat! He left his family behind! ♪

Spinel always hated that part, not that Steven ever knew.

♪ Cookie Caaa _aaa_ t! ♪

"Now available at Gurgens off Route 109," Steven mimicked. The whole spectacle was greeted with giggles from Amethyst and Pearl and applause from Garnet. Spinel merely puffed her cheeks out a little and rolled her eyes.

Steven gained a grateful smile. "I can't believe you did this. I'm gonna save these forever!" Steven paused. "...Right after I eat this one." Already, a warmth was washing through Steven's body.

He tore open the wrapper. "Hello, old friend..." Steven heartily chomped down on the ice cream sandwich. "So, so good..." Steve exclaimed. The warmth felt so good that Steven didn't know his gem started glowing.

"Oh, gee!" Spinel got excited. Was this finally happening?

Amethyst called out, "Uh, Steven..."

"Wha-..." Steven lifted up his shirt. His gem was one-hundred percent glowing and all nine eyes were on him.

Eager, smiling, and supportive, Amethyst tried directing, "Quick, try to summon your weapon!"

"I don't know how!" Steven yelped. The glow started fading away and the poor boy started to panic. "Aaaah, it's fading! How do I make it come back!?"

"Calm down, Steven. Breathe, don't force it," Pearl offered.

Amethyst grinned slyly. "Yeah, and try not to poop yourself either."

Spinel grimaced. "Amethyst, ew."

Garnet spoke up, "Please don't."

With nothing happening, the glow of the gem completely faded away and everyone let out a dejected sigh.

"Aww, I was really close that time..." Steven lamented, putting the Cookie Cat back into the packaging. "Can one of you just explain how to summon a weapon?"

With immediate enthusiasm, Pearl piped up, "Oh, I'll go first~!"

* * *

Steven and Pearl were nearby a cherry blossom tree with the wind putting on a serene mood. Various leaves and petals, one by one, were falling off and drifting to the ground. Pearl began explaining, "Pay attention to these petals, Steven. The petals' dance seems improvised, but it is being calculated in real time based on the physical properties of this planet. With hard work and dedication, you can master the magical properties of your gem and perform your own dance!"

Pearl gestured to the gem on her forehead. It lit up, and as Pearl raised her arms to the expansive heavens, her spear popped out of her gem. With a grace seen only by select few people, Pearl flourished her weapon and sets it in ground, smiling with pride. "...Like so."

* * *

Steven, next to the Big Donut, threw the collected fallen cherry blossom leaves into the air. He studied the petals intently, but their dance didn't seem to follow any sort of rhyme or reason to him.

"...Did Pearl tell you the petal thing?" a nearby Amethyst asked.

"Yeah, I need to practice really hard so I can dance like a tree... I think," Steven explained.

"Listen Steven, all that practice stuff is no fun," Amethyst started. She took a bite out of the donut in her hand and continued, "Whenever I need to summon my weapon, it just happens." Amethyst casually pulls a whip out of her gem and bisects the nearby trash container.

"See? Didn't try at all," Amethyst ends.

Steven is left scratching his head in confusion. Lars rounded the corner, saw the broken trash can, and proceeded to make a noise which everyone silently agreed sounded like a suffocating seagull.

* * *

Steven didn't get it and was quickly running out of advice he can get from people. There were only four Crystal Gems and he's halfway down. He hoped Garnet could help him. "So I'm supposed to work really hard and not try at all at the same time?"

"...Yes." Garnet's advice was... less than helpful.

"...Or," Garnet continued, "You could link your mind with the energy of all existing matter. Channeling the collective power of the universe through your gem, which results in..." Garnet proceeds to flourish her arms with pragmatic gestures, finally summoning her gauntlets. "At least that's my way of doin' it."

Steven couldn't even.

* * *

One last person. One last try. With a deep breath, Steven approached the Spinel manning the fair's high striker game.

"Oh, hi there, lil' S. You manage to summon your weapon?" she asked.

"No, not yet. I need to ask you how you summon... your... Wait, do you even have a weapon?" Steven questioned.

Spinel shrugged. "Gee, what can I say? I don't really need it. Especially not with my powers. With them..." Spinel increases the size of her hand to massive proportion and brings it over her head. "I can do all sortsa things, like this!"

The pink-colored gem slammed her fist into the machine, causing the marker to rise to the top, knock the bell off, and disappear into the upper echelons of the atmosphere. "...Eheheh, Oops."

"Woah..." Seven uttered, "...So how do you summon your weapon?"

Spinel rubs the back of her head. "I just focus on a thing," Spinel said, putting her hand over her gem, "put my hand ovah my gem, and... poof!" Spinel summons a curved dagger attached to the top of her wrist.

"Cool...! So what do you focus on?" Steven questioned.

"Me? Anger," Spinel answered. Wait- "Buuuut seeing you, your thing was anything but that." Spinel unsummoned her weapon.

"So do you know what I should focus on?" Steven inquired.

"...Uuuuuuuuuuh..." Spinel pokes both of her pointer fingers together, offering an unsure smile. She honestly had no idea and was just spitballing. Not that Steven knew that. "Cookie... Cats...?"

* * *

Back at home, Steven gathered the four gems to try and summon his weapon. "I think my best bet is to recreate what happened the last time my gem glowed," Steven explained. "So..."

Steven directs the gems into position. "Garnet and Amethyst were here. Pearl was next to the fridge. Spinel, you were sitting on the couch." Steven then turned to face Amethyst.

"Hmm. Amethyst, I think your arms were crossed," he directed.

Amethyst complied, crossing her arms. "Okay, your majesty."

Steven then turned to Pearl. "Pearl, your foot was like this." Steven moved her foot ever-so-slightly.

Pearl frowned, showing doubts. "I don't think it works this way, Steven."

Steven turned to Spinel. With a hmm, he looked up and down Spinel's body. "Uh... Spinel, I think your legs were a bit more noodlier."

Spinel maked her legs a little more rubber hose-ish. "Like this?"

Steven nods and turned to Garnet. "And Garnet, uh..." Steven moved her face upward a little bit into an awkward pose. "...Yeah."

The unsure boy then retrieves the opened Cookie Cat package. "Then I took a bite of this Cookie Cat- Oh, wait!" Steven frowns. He almost forgot. "I sang the song first."

"Uh, he's a frozen treat... all new taste... interstellar war... now available at Gurgens..." Steven waited. He waited for what felt like an eternity when it was only, in fact, four seconds. He deflated.

"Awww, it was funnier last time..." Steven lamented. He lefts his shirt to peer at his gem. "Maybe I'm not a real Crystal Gem..."

"Hogwash!" Spinel explains.

"Yeah, don't be silly, Steven. Of course you are," Pearl reassures.

"And you're fun to have around, even if your gem is useless." Amethyst immediately got glares from both Pearl and Spinel. "I mean... you're one of us, Steven," she backtracks, "We're not the Crystal Gems without you."

Garnet netted her approval by nodding.

"Yeah," Steven began, "Even if I don't have powers, I've still got... Cookie Cat!" He triumphantly took another chomp out of his favorite ice cream sandwiches. "Mmm, so good..."

Unbeknownst to Steven, his gem began to glow again. But this time?

This time... in a dazzling display of pink light... Steven's gem projected... a shield!

Upon witnessing such an amazing milestone, the gems collectively uttered gasps of praise and amazement.

Pearl was the first to recover her voice. "Steven... it a shield...!"

Steven opened his eyes and saw his weapon. "Whoa... what!? I get a shield!?" Excitement filled his inner being. "Ooooooh **YEAH**!"

Steven thrust his arms into the air in celebration. Upon doing so, the shield flew off and began ricocheting all around the room, eventually implanting into and destroying the TV. That was the third one this week.

Amethyst began to laugh as Pearl facepalmed. "...Ha! I knew it!" Spinel began, "It _was_ the Cookie Cat!"

"I summon my weapon by eating ice cream!" Steven exclaimed.

Pearl picked a Cookie Cat wrapper off of the floor, examining it. "What's in these things?"

"Tons of artificial sugars and preservatives. US Law says they have to list all ingredients on all food products," Spinel offered.

Just then, the house began to rumble whilst Steven's shield disappeared. A swarm of centipeetles rushed up the window and wall on the outside of the house.

"...What was that?" Steven asked.

The Crystal Gems rushed out of the house and looked around. They spotted the centipeetle swarm... along with...

"It's the mother!" Garnet was the first to point out.

"Stay in the house, Steven!" Pearl warned.

"Stay safe, lil' S!" Spinel added.

"No way!" Steven refuted, "I'm coming, too!" He ran back into the kitchen and gathered all the Cookie Cat sandwiches he could hold and stuffed them into the freezer, which he also collected, plus extention cords. Meanwhile, the Crystal Gems were dodging the acid spit attacks of the gigantic mother centipeedle. Unfortunately, as time went on, the gems were forced to retreat behind some shelter and got pinned down.

"Ain't this swell! I've heard of acid reflex disease, but this is ridiculous!" Spinel complained. "The heck do we do?"

"We could really use Steven's shield right about now!" Amethyst unhelpfully offered.

"We don't have Steven's shield." Garnet pointed out.

Fortunately, for the gems, Steven started throwing pebbles at the mother centipeetle. "Hey!" Steven yelled. "Leave them alone!" With that order, Steven set the Cookie Cat freezer on the ground.

All the gems looked to see what happened and saw Steven in danger. "Steven, no!" all the gems shouted.

This was it. This was Steven's big moment. "Cookie Cat Crystal combo powers... ACTIVAAAAATE!" Steven started munching and consuming each and every single Cookie Cat ice cream sandwich he could as fast as he could, lifting his shirt up

The gems dodge another acid spray. "Steven, no!" Spinel yipped, "The lycasin!"

And another. "We need to save Steven!" Pearl directed.

And another. "Can we save ourselves first!?" Amethyst pleaded.

Steven just continued eating. "Goodbye, my friends..." Another Cookie Cat inhaled. Steven continued to wait.. but nothing was happening.

Why was nothing happening? "Why isn't it working!?" The centipeetle lunged at Steven, to which Steven barely dodged.

"Steven!" Garnet called out. Unfortunately, this drew the attention to her and seconds later, she struggled to not be bisected by the centipeetle mother's large, dangerous tailclaw.

Steven recovered and got his bearings only to have found the cookie cat freezer melting under the acid. He rushed over to it, his stomach dropping. "No... Oh, no no no no no..!" It was completely ruined.

This had to stop now.

"Cookie Cat... he's a pet for your tummy..." Steven began.

"Cookie Cat... he's super duper YUMMY!" Steven pucks up the extension cords, beginning one final attack.

"Cookie Cat! He left his family behind!" Steven used the extension cords and whipped the Cookie Cat freezer into the centipeetle mother.

"COOKIE CAAAAAAT!" The freezer lands and electricity began to fry the gem monster.

"Now available... nowhere..." Steven fell to his knees in solemn nostalgia... a nostalgia he'll never be able to feel again.

"...Yes!" Amethyst exclaims triumphantly.

"Gems. Weapons," Garnet ordered. Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl summoned their weapons whilst Spinel made her body into a spring.

"Ready?" Spinel inquired, the gems getting into position to be sprung from Spinel. "Let's put this dame on ice!" With that, Spinel sprung with the gems toward the indisposed centipeetle monster and let loose their attacks... causing it to disappear into its gem. It fell to the ground and Garnet walked over to it and bubbled it.

Steven, meanwhile, still lamented. He dug a small hole. "Farewell, sweet Cookie Cats." He put the packaging into the hole and covered it. Rest in gooey, tasty pieces. "I'll always remember the time we spent together."

Steven's stomach rumbled. "Shh, hush now."

Amethyst approached whilst Spinel stretched an arm into the house. "Well," Amethyst started, "I guess your powers don't come from ice cream."

"Of course they don't come from ice cream," Pearl rebutted. " Don't worry, Steven, I'm sure some day you'll figure out how to activate your gem."

"Yes," Garnet agreed, smiling, "in your own Steven-y way."

"I'm okay guys. I just-" Steven began, but Steven suddenly felt a wave of nausea overwhelm him. "Ugh... I think I ate too many Cookie Cats."

Spinel's arm finally retracted from the house with a bucket in tow. She set the bucket down in front of the poor boy. "Please keep it in the bucket."


	2. Laser Light Cannon

Steven and Amethyst rushed over to Beach Citywalk Fries. They hoped it wasn't too late.

"Hey, Fryman," Steven began. He slammed his hands down on the counter. "Give me the bits!"

Unfortunately, Mr. Fryman had just finished turning the sign to indicate that thy were now closed for the day. "Steven, we’re closed..."

"Aww, what...?" If Steven had only been a couple seconds faster... Maybe he can ask the gems if there's something which allows him to travel back in time, or-

"Give 'em the bits!" Amethyst ordered, beginning to rhythmically slam the counter. "The BITS. The BITS. The BITS." Steven quickly joined in on the action.

Mr. Fryman very quickly caved under the pressure of Steven's impromptu army of overeager adorableness. There was no way he could resist any longer. "Okay, okay! Take it easy on the counter, will ya?"

Amethyst and Steven celebrated as Mr. Fryman readied up the fry bits. "I can give you actual fries if you want," he offered.

"Just the bits, please," Steven denied, He grabbed the bag handed to him. "Thanks!"

Steven and Amethyst walked away, beginning to munch on the crunchy fry bits. "Ah, sunset," Steven began, "my favorite time of day. When the sun goes down, and the second sun gets bigger and bigger in the sky..."

Amethyst burst out guffawing, letting some of the half-chewed food to spew out of her mouth. "Yeah, that big hot second su-" Just as Amethyst saw... whatever it was, she gasped.

This was trouble. There was some red sun clearly above the horizon. "Oh no, what is that doing here?"

"Um," Steven began, swallowing some fry bits down. "What is it?"

Amethyst's answer was to pick Steven up over his head and begin running to where the other Crystal Gems were. Steven fumbled the fry bit bag to the ground. "Ah, my bits!"

* * *

Spinel, Garnet, and Amethyst were nearby the base of the hill, looking at the second strange sun. Pearl was looking through a telescope, Spinel had an eye extended as if looking through her own telescope. All three were frowning, worried.

"This is bad," Garnet stated.

"Look at the size of it," Pearl noted, "I had no idea these things were so big!"

"This can't be natural," Spinel confessed. "This goes against every astronomer's notebook and even scientists should have known about this beforehand. This practically appeared overnight. ...Overday?"

"Garnet! Pearl! Spinel!" Amethyst shouted, running up to the three gems. Pearl looked back and Spinel retracted her eye.

"We _saw_ ," Pearl began, annoyed. "Some of us are trying to protect humanity. Where were you?"

Amethyst plopped Steven down on his feet. "Eating fry bits."

"...Got any for me?" Spinel inquired.

Pearl just groaned. Who wanted to eat during an uncertain crisis such as this?

"Can I see?" Steven ran up to the telescope and looked through it. "...Woah..."

The eye that Steven saw opened up what appeared to be an outer shell, leaving a hexagonal red eye visible. "It's a giant eyeball!" Steven smiles giddily. "Awesome!"

"Not awesome!" Pearl scolded, "It's a red eye!"

This left Steven disconcerted, putting his hands on the sides of his head. "A red eye? It’s going to infect us all!"

"Ya thinking of pink eye, lil' S," Spinel corrects. Amethyst giggles.

Pearl began to explain, "It’s going to crash into Beach City and crush us, along with a bunch of oblivious, innocent people! We have to stop it."

"What are we going to do?" Steven asks.

Garnet adjusts her visor. "The only thing powerful enough to destroy it is a Laser Cannon that belonged to Rose Quartz."

"My mom?" Steven asked.

"Or a nuclear bomb," Spinel began, "but it's way too close already."

Amethyst grimaced. "If Rose were here, this would be so easy."

"I know," Pearl began, "but she’s not. And the cannon is missing. We’ll have to find another solution. Spinel, how quickly can you get a nuclear bomb?"

Spinel was incredulous. "I've nevah even talked to the president of the United States, toots!"

"If the cannon belonged to my mom," Steven surmised, "I bet my dad knows where it is. He can help us save the day!"

The gems looked uncertainly at each other. 

"Greg is..." Pearl began, looking for a polite way to put it, "...nice, Steven, but I doubt Rose would entrust someone like him with such a powerful weapon."

Amethyst puts a hand on one of Steven's shoulders. "Your dad is kind of a mess, Steven."

"Amethyst!" Pearl scolded.

"Yeah, he's lazy deadbeat," Spinel added.

"Spinel!" Pearl scolded.

"Even if she did leave it with him," Amethyst began, "he probably broke it, or lost it, or dropped it in the ocean by now."

"True," Garnet uttered.

"No way!" Steven rebutted. "I’m sure he’s just keeping it somewhere safe. I’ll go ask him."

Garnet interjected, "We can handle this, Steven." She walks over to Amethyst, picking her up. "Ready?"

Amethyst nodded, prompting Garnet to jump up high into the air. She summoned her strength and threw Amethyst as hard as she can toward the red eye thing. Amethyst let loose a war cry... only to ineffectively thud against it and fall into the ocean. The gems were reasonably disappointed nothing happened.

Spinel formed her legs into a spring. "Let me give this a whirl." She sprung herself high into the air toward the red eye thing, growing her fist into gigantic proportions. "I may not be a nuke, but I know exactly how to put this oversized baseball _on the board_!"

When she was close enough, she swung her fist directly into the red eye with nearly all of her might... only to be met with a resounding thud and a spike of pain flowing through her body. Spinel gained a very strained smile and her eyes teared up. "...I am become pain," Spinel warbled through her gritted smile. She then fell into the ocean on top of Amethyst.

"Ugh..." Steven ran out of patience with the gems. It was time he tried something more sensible. "I’m gonna go."

Pearl absentmindedly responded, "Okay, good luck..."

* * *

Steven thunked his hand repeatedly on his father's van, hoping to catch his attention. "Dad, it’s me! Dad, are you in there?" Nothing so far. "Wake up! We have to save the world!" Still nobody.

Steven stopped and climbed onto the roof of the van. He began stomping and jumping up and down, eventually causing the car alarm to go off. Steven smiled. This will surely get his attention.

And soon enough, Steven's dad, Greg, burst out of the back doors of his van, looking around, frenzied. "Who’s there!? I have a waffle iron!"

"Dad, it’s me!" Steven piped up.

Greg relaxed and looked back. He looked through now-bleary eyes to see his son. He absentmindedly turned the car alarm off. "...Steven?"

Steven jumped off the roof of the van, ran over, and hugged his dad, who reciprocated. "I almost waffled your face," Greg explained. "What are you doing up so late?"

"What do you mean?" Steven questioned. "The sun just went down an hour ago."

"Oh, heh." Greg rubbed the back of his head with a hand. "It was a... slow day at the car wash. Anyway, what’s up? Just needed to see your old man? Pal around? Learn some lessons about life?"

"No," Steven refuted. "I need the light cannon that belonged to mom, to blow up that eyeball!"

"Eyeball?" Greg parroted.

Steven points in the exact direction of the mysterious and malevolent red eye. "That!"

Greg looked. He saw Spinel springing Amethyst, Garnet, and herself to the eyeball to attack it. The attack was, of course, ineffectual and all three fell into the ocean. Sploosh.

"Wait, is that a magical thing?" he inquired, raiding his arms in front of him. "The Gems told me not to get involved with magic stuff." He rubs the back of his head with a hand. "It... it could be dangerous or interfere with what’s left of my hair."

"But..." Steven pleaded, "they need mom’s cannon. You've gotta know where it is." As Steven pleaded, Greg put away the waffle iron and closed the back doors of his van. "Like a cave dungeon or a cloud fortress... or in a clam at the bottom of the ocean!"

Aah, the wonders of Steven's childish imagination brought a smile onto Greg's face. He hoped Steven never ceased. "Well, I don’t know about all that. But I have an idea where it might be."

* * *

The father and son duo approached the storage units. Greg's son began to run toward it.

"A magical storage unit!" Steven exclaimed.

"Ha, not exactly," Greg started. He winked. "But some would say there’s magic inside."

Steven blankly stared at his father. He didn't understand.

Greg explained, "...It’s just a shed I use to keep things that don’t fit in the van." He opens up the storage door. "If it’s anywhere, it’ll be in here."

Steven walked up to the wall of boxes. He tried moving one, only for them to collapse a little. Yeah, this seemed a little too dangerous without...

"If I’m going in there," Steven began, "I’m gonna need some gear." He gathers enough materials to tie a flashlight to his head and wrap an extension cord around his waist so he doesn't get lost inside. "Here I go!"

Greg securely held the other end of the extension cord in his hands. "Good luck."

And thus began Steven's journey into the cavernous depths of Greg's storage unit, looking for his mother's laser light cannon.

"Woah..." Steven saw so many interesting things. A nicely-painted picture of a cat. An oni mask. A pinball machine. A pair of oversized goofy clown shoes. "It’s like a dad museum..."

Steven squeezed by some musty mattresses and spotted a canon-like shape. His eyes lit up and he rushed toward it, only to spot that it was... a golf bag. "...Do you golf?" Steven called out.

"Eh," Greg began, "I’d like to think of myself as someone who would golf... eventually." Yep. Eventually.

Steven continued to look around, eventually spotting another cannon-like object. "Yes!" He rushed over to it and brushed what was on top of it... only to find that it was a drum. "Aww..."

The brave adventureboy continued to search, but the drum. It beckoned. He pat the drum once. It was a satisfying sound. With that, Steven continued his search. Something caught his eye.

"Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! Is this...?" He picked the object up and pulled the trigger... causing a shirt to pop out. Steven investigated further. It was just a t-shirt that said 'Buy T-Shirt Cannons'.

The boy glanced down, spotting a box full of various CDs and smiled. "Hey, there’s a bunch of copies of your old CDs!"

Greg couldn't help but smile nostalgically. "Oh, man, I couldn’t give those things away. You know, before I ran the car wash, when I was a one-man band, I traveled the whole country!"

Steven pocketed a CD. "I know, Dad."

Greg exposited, "When I came to play a concert here in Beach City, no one showed up except—"

"An alligator!" Steve interrupted, smiling.

Greg's grin grew ever so slightly. What a silly boy. "No, it was your mother!"

Steven chuckled, crawling ever deeper. "I know."

"And we were always together after that," Greg continued. "Until she gave up her physical form to bring you into the world." Steven heard the sound of glass shatter. "I don’t know what a magic lady like her ever saw in a plain old dope like me."

Steven glanced down to see a photo of Greg and Rose Quartz, his mother. He frowned and gasped. "Uh, Dad, I broke a photo."

Greg merely smiled, brushing it off. "It’s okay buddy. If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hot dogs."

Steven smiled at the phrase. It's a good and surprisingly deep phrase. Suddenly, something appeared to glow nearby. "Huh?" Steven moved closer to examine it, and gasped.

"The light cannon...!" Steven exclaimed.

Greg looked back, scratching his chest. The red eye thing looked much closer than before. "Oh boy, that thing’s giving me the willies..."

"Dad!" Steven yelled. "Dad, I found it!"

"Really?" Greg asked.

Steven untied the cord from his waist and tied it to the cannon, calling back. "Get the van!"

Greg tied his end of the electrical cord to the van, got in, and started it. With a few revs of the van, Greg stepped on the gas. Slowly but surely, everything came out of the storage unit. Steve and Greg reunited at the laser light cannon.

"This thing could save the city," Steve explained, "we've gotta get it to the beach!"

"How?" Greg asked. It’s too big for the van.

Steven looked around for anything that could be used to help carry the cannon. After a few seconds, he spotted a wagon and pulled it out. Greg tied the electrical cord from the van to the wagon and the father and son duo picked up the laser light cannon and set it down on the wagon.

* * *

Greg, now driving the van to the beach with Steven, looked worried.

Steve asked, "Is it gonna be okay?"

Greg shrugged. "If every pork chop were perfect..."

"We wouldn’t have hot doooogs!" Steven chimed in.

Greg glanced out the window. He sees the eye. "That thing’s getting huge... it's freaking me out."

Steven glances around. "Can’t the van go any faster?"

Greg slammed on the gas. "This is faster!"

"...Don’t worry," Steven reassured, then smiling. "Come on, let’s put on your CD." Steve took the CD out of his pocket and showed it to his father.

Greg blushed, a little embarrassed. "Uh, really? Come on, you’ve heard it."

"You come on," Steve fired back, inserting the CD into the CD player, which began to play.

♪ I know I'm not that tall ♪  
♪ I know I'm not that smart ♪

At this point, Steven began singing along a bit.

♪ But let me drive my van into your heart ♪

Greg smiled, allowing his son to enjoy his fun.

♪ Let me drive my van into your heart ♪  
♪ I know I'm not that rich ♪  
♪ I'm trying to get my start ♪  
♪ So let me drive my van into your heart ♪  
♪ Let me drive my van into your heart ♪

The van slowly dragged its way onto the beach.

♪ And if we look out of place ♪

The van pulled up next to Garnet, Spinel, and Pearl. Spinel was very annoyed that she was put on hold.

♪ Well, baby, that's okay ♪

Amethyst washed up on shore.

♪ I'll drive us into outer space ♪

Amethyst stood up, looking to Spinel. "Spring us again, I think we're cracking it!"

♪ Where we can't hear what people say ♪

Greg and Steven left the car, the gems turning their attention to the pulled up van.

♪ I know I don't have a plan ♪

"Is that...?" Spinel asked, hanging up and putting her phone away into her gem.

♪ I'm working on that part ♪

Pearl gasped in amazement. "He really had it!"

♪ At least I've got a van ♪

Amethyst smiled, thrusting her arms up. "We're saved!"

♪ So let me drive my van into your heart ♪

Suddenly, the red eye's gravitational field started to pull everything toward it. Sand, loose twigs, various trash... even shingles.

♪ Let me drive my van into your heart ♪

Mr. Fryman's sign wobbled in the force of conflicting gravity. "Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah!"

♪ Let me drive my van into your heart ♪

The sign fell, the only thing saving Mr. Fryman was Spinel's arm. It stretched out, wrapped around him, and pulled him out of the way.

♪ Let me drive my van into your heart ♪

Mr. Fryman sighed in relief. "Thank you!" Spinel smiled and gave a thumbs up in return.

♪ Let me drive my van into your _heaaaaart_ ♪

"We have to use it now," Garnet pointed out.

Pearl rushed up to the cannon, trying to find some sort of button or switch. "I don’t know how it works, it was Rose’s!"

Spinel complained, "...Ain't this swell, and I just hung up on da white house!"

Panicking a little, Steven turned to his father. "Dad, how do we use it?"

Greg just shrugged.

Pearl turned Steven to face her. "Steven, this is serious...!"

"...The gem!" Spinel exclaimed. "Steven, you have Rose’s gem!"

Steven lifted his shirt up to peer at the gem on his belly.

Amethyst picked Steven up. "That's it!" She smooshed Steven into the cannon and began rubbing Steven against it up and down. Nothing happened. "Aaaah, come on...!"

"Try rubbing faster!" Spinel offered. "More vigorously! We hafta make the white beam shoot out!"

"Spinel!" Greg chastised.

"Stop that," Garnet commanded.

"It’s no use..." Pearl lamented.

"Fine, forget it!" Amethyst yelled. She turned her attention to Spinel. "Launch me again!"

"That’s not gonna work," Spinel shot down.

The gravitational pull began to pull Greg's van, the cannon and wagon along with it. "I got this." Greg was the first to act, rushing over and untying the extension cord. He then got pulled alongside the van.

"Oh, wait, nope! Maybe I don’t!

"Please work," Steven pleaded. "Unlock! Activate! Go! Please! Everyone’s counting on you, you can’t just be useless!" Steven smiled encouragingly. I know you can help.

"It’s okay, Steven," Greg reassured. "We’ll figure out something else. Something even better."

"...Right," Steven agreed. "If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hot dogs."

The cannon began to glow again. Steven released his grip and fell into the sand.

The gems gaped in amazement as the laser light cannon powered up.

"...It's working!" Pearl noted.

Then... the cannon barrel fell to the ground. The gems gasped. The angle was now way too low and would miss. Something had to be done to correct the trajectory. Steven rushed up from the ground and began to struggle to lift the barrel as the cannon continued to power up. The four other gems took a note of this and ran in to assist, instantly correcting the angle. Now it would never miss.

"This is it!" Amethyst exclaimed.

"Brace yourselves!" Garnet warned.

"Last time, Spinel began, "I got a strike, but this time, you're definitely going on-"

The laser light cannon interrupted Spinel, finally firing off the beam. It took the shape of a rose before it collided into the red eye, cracking it up and destroying it. Debris fell around everywhere.

Amethyst grinned. "Steven, you just saved most of Beach City!"

"SORRY ABOUT THAT!" Steven yelled at Mr. Fryman.

"...WHAT?" Mr. Fryman responded.

Pearl frowned, confused. "How did you get it to work?"

"I just said that thing that Dad always says," Steve responded.

"That thing about pork rinds?" Pearl asked.

"Hot dogs," Spinel corrected.

"Rose..." Greg uttered. His eyes had tears in them. He really, really missed his wife, but his thoughts got interrupted by the sea level returning to normal. Everyone let out a chuckle of relief. Greg's van passed by him, then back out into the ocean. "My van!"

"It’s okay, Dad," Steve reassured. "If every pork chop were perfect-"

Greg frantically gripped Spinel's arm with pleading eyes. "I live in there!"

Spinel puffed her cheeks out and rolled her eyes, but saved the van, nonetheless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, the second chapter. Sorry this is Spinel-light, but this was absolutely a Greg episode.


	3. Cheeseburger Backpack

Steven Universe sat on the rock next to the house the Crystal Gems and himself lived in, waiting. The mail should be arriving soon, and he's excited to finally get what Spinel ordered for him.

♪ Hey Mr. Postman, bring me a post ♪  
♪ Bring me the post that I love the most ♪

As if on cue, Jamie, the mailman, entered into view and approached Steven. The young boy got excited and jumped off of the rock. "My song came true! Do you have a package for me today?"

Jamie smiles, ruffling through his mail pack. "Let me see what I've got here... Did you order a loaf of bread with a stamp on it?"

"No," Steven responded.

"Did you order a jury summon for R.J. Finkle?" Jamie questioned.

"That's not me, I'm Steven," he corrected.

"Oh, right, right, right, Steven," Jamie said, pulling a package out. "Here it is: Steven Universe."

"This thing is gonna help me save the world!" Steven exclaimed.

"Really?" Jamie questioned. "It says it's from Wacky Sacks Supply Company."

"Garnet, Spinel, Amethyst, and Pearl think I shouldn't go on magic adventures because I don't know how to use my Gem powers," Steven explained.

"That seems reasonable," Jamie surmised.

"But there are _other_ ways I can help," Steven explained.

"With a Wacky Sack?" Jamie questioned.

"Exactly!" Steven answered.

"Do you know how you can save _my_ world?" Jamie began, taking out a signature pad. "Sign here, please."

Steven did so, adding in a few stars as well. Jamie nodded and put the pad away. "Barb gets on my case if I don't get signatures," he explained.

Steven frowns a little, feeling sympathetic. "That's awful."

Just then, Steven's house glowed blue. He gasped. This only meant one thing. "The gems are back!" Steven snatched the package and ran up to enter the house.

"Wait, Steven," Jamie started as Steven entered the house, "what is a Wacky Sack?"

* * *

Steven opened the door to be greeted with the sight of Garnet having feathers in her afro. "Hello, Steven."

"Amethyst," Pearl began, "we do _not_ need that! It's not going to fit in the fridge!"

Amethyst, carrying a giant egg, said, "What? I got this," gripping the metal shelf in the fridge.

"Ammy, are you mental?" Spinel asked. "I can just as easily go to the store and buy a carton of eggs if you really-"

Amethyst dropped the shelf along with everything on it. "Look, it fits! Ha!" She slammed the door to the fridge. "Oh man, We can make a big omelet, or a quiche, or big sunny side ups!"

"Amethyst," Spinel began, rubbing her forehead, "you are gonna cause my credit card to default." She began picking up all the food that was on the floor.

Pearl, holding a statue, turned to Steven and explained, "We fought a giant bird. We're only here for a second, we've got to go back out."

"What? Why?" Steven asked.

Pearl exposited, "We have to place this Moon Goddess Statue on the top of the Lunar Sea Spire before midnight. Without it, the whole place will fall apart! Oh, Steven, you should have seen the spire in its heyday." Pearl conjured up a lovely image of the Lunar Sea Spire to demonstrate. "It was an oasis for Gems on Earth."

"It's abandoned now," Spinel began, "but we can still save it with that statue, lil' S!"

Steven's eyes lit up. "That's perfect!"

"What? Why?" Pearl questioned.

"Because I can help carry it for you," Steven explained, "in this!" Steven opened up the top flaps of the box and slowly revealed the hamburger backpack. Overly dramatic and flashy sound effects were uttered from his mouth.

"Dang, lil' S, that's so cool!" Spinel praised despite her being the one that bought it for Steven.

Pearl, on the other hand, was less enthused. "A hamburger...?"

"It's a novelty backpack, shaped like a cheeseburger," Steven began. "...Aww, I blew it. I was just going to wear it one day, and you guys would've thought it was cool!"

"But I do," Spinel rebutted.

"Besides you!" Steven explained. "...But this is obviously important Gem business."

"Yes," Pearl began, "so you should let us take care of it."

"What? I'm a Gem!" Steven complained, lifting up his shirt and showing off his gem.

"But you've still got a lot to learn," Pearl shot down.

"So, let him come! It'll be educational," Amethyst offered.

"Yeah!" Spinel agreed. "And this job's da furthest away _from_ being dangerous. Just insert object A into slot B and we're done."

"Hmm..." Pearl thought, "...alright. You can carry it in your hamburger." She handed the statue off to Steven. He set the cheeseburger backpack on the ground and began opening the zippers to show it off.

"Check this out," Steven began, "Everything's a pocket! Even the cheese is a pocket! I could fit a lot more stuff in here. Give me a minute. I'll pack extra supplies." Steven dashed around the house, gathering various supplies including bagels, extra coats, a raft, and a kite, amongst other things. As he finished up, he spotted one of his favorite buddies laying on the floor.

"Mr. Queasy! You're definitely going to come in handy," Steven said. He took out a first-aid kit and replaced it with Mr. Queasy.

"Steven," Pearl began, running out of patience, "Let's go."

Steven rushes over to the warp pad the gems are standing on. "Coming!"

"Woah, Steven," Pearl began, "did you bring your whole room?"

"Back that _thang_ up," Amethyst said.

"Let's warp," Garnet ordered.

The warp pad activated, bringing a blue light up all around them. However, Steven's stomach hung over a little.

"Ya gotta suck it in a bit, lil' S," Spinel offered.

Steven took a deep breath, squeezing his stomach in just enough for the warp pad to fully enclose them and begin to warp them to their destination.

"Do you remember how to do this?" Pearl inquired.

The answer Steven told was him giggling and floating around.

Pearl sighed, "Keep your head in the game."

* * *

The group of five arrived swiftly at the sea spire. Steven flopped to the ground. He got up and started wondrously looking around, taking in the sights and stars in his eyes.

"Woah... The sea spire...!" Steven exhaled.

The gems, however, saw a completely different story. Old, decrepit, and falling apart.

"It wasn't like this a hundred years ago," Pearl lamented.

Spinel sighed, "I shoulda came back here more often."

"I'm sensing structural instability," Garnet noted.

"Oh, yeah," Steven began. "That's never good." Steven continued allowing his eyes to drift around and enjoy the ancient stories that the aging tower held. The ground cracked beneath him and nearly sent him into a watery ravine, but Pearl managed to jump and save Steven from falling, hugging him close.

"Alright, hold on," Pearl began, "we're taking Steven back!"

The toy in Steven's backpack began to talk as Pearl set him down. Steven giggled, opened the backpack up, and presented Mr. Queasy to everyone. "Oh, Mr. Queasy..."

Pearl frowned a little. "Steven. This place is your heritage."

"She's right, lil' S," Spinel confirmed. "There's a time and a place for entertainment, and this ain't one a those times. Ya need to focus. Can ya do that?"

"You got it, dude!" Steven exclaimed, blepping his tongue out.

"...Swell..." Spinel moaned.

"Enough," Garnet ordered. "We have to move."

The group silently agreed and moved on, approaching the spire. They reach the edge of a cliff before Garnet signals to stop.

"What's the hold-up?" Amethyst inquired. "We can clear this easily."

"No," Garnet responded. "The magic that sustains the whirlpool creates a vortex that will pull us below." To demonstrate this, she picked up a nearby rock and tried to toss it to the spire. It was pulled down by the vortex around halfway through.

"So we can't jump?" Pearl questioned.

"Spinel!" Steven began. "You can wrap yourself around all of us and get us to the other side!"

"Uh..." Spinel hesitated. She briefly poked both of her pointer fingers together. "I- I don't wanna cause the entire spire to collapse. My stretchy powers can be destructive." Spinel offered a shrug, setting her arms back down to her sides afterwards.

"Hmm," Steven thought, "...Oh, wait!" He opened his backpack and pulled out a couple of sweaters, tying them together.

"What are those for?" Amethyst inquired.

"They were for keeping warm," Steven explained, "but check it out!"

With a determined grin, he flung the makeshift sweatshirt rope over to the other side of the spire, managing to hook it in an archway. He took a deep breath and jumped as far as he could. He started to get pulled into the vortex, but held on strong to the sweaters. With determined giddiness and vigor, he pulled himself up to the floor of the spire.

"Cheeseburger...!" Steven roared. Spinel and Amethyst smiled as Pearl looked really worried.

"...Backpack!" Spinel responded.

"Steven!" Amethyst exclaimed. "Way to go! C'mon, guys!" With gusto, Amethyst summoned her whip and tied it to the archway Steven's shirt hung from. She picked up the other three crystal gems and swung across.

Pearl was unhappy. "Don't ever do that again!"

"Sorry..." Steven apologized. Garnet ruffled his hair playfully as Spinel game a hearty thumbs up.

Pearl's face softened up. "But... it was pretty great."

* * *

Pearl glanced around as the group waled, frowning dejectedly. And frequently complaining.

"Oh, and this statue once had a head..." Pearl lamented.

Spinel grinned and shrugged. "Not ta worry. Once the statue's in place, it'll restore alla this to its former glory, so-"

Just then, Pearl spotted some weird creatures crawling around on the statue, yelped, and sliced at them, slicing the remainder of the head on the statue off with her spear.

"What was that goober?" Steven asked.

"Crystal shrimp," Spinel responded, frowning a little.

"You guys?" Amethyst offered, "we got a problem!"

The group headed over to where Amethyst was and saw the whole place was crawling with crystal shrimp.

"It's an infestation," Pearl explained. "And we have to pass through here to get to the top."

Steven bends down to inspect one closer. 'Can't you just squish them?"

Pearl panicked, pulling Steven away from the crystal shrimp. "Don't touch that, their shards are deadly! We need to clear a path."

She activated her hologram, projecting an image of Amethyst. "Amethyst, if you go around to the side and disturb them with a spin attack... " Pearl moved the holographic image over to the indicated spot and demonstrated the spin attack. When done, Pearl projected an image of Garnet. She moved the image to the walk, then on the ceiling.

"And Garnet, if you move to the ceiling and strike this exact spot..." Pearl form,ed an X nearby the holographic Garnet.

"Then," Pearl continued, "Spinel can spring me with my-"

Steven, however, thought this was too complicated a plan and had a much simpler solution. He ran in front of Pearl, his backpack opened again. "BAGEL SANDWICH!" He tossed around a few bagels to opposite ends of the area. The crystal shrimp afvanced to the two bagels, allowing for a safe path to be cleared.

"Brilliant," Garnet said.

"Oh hey, what do you know," Amethyst added.

"Told ya food was good," Spinel said, glancing at Pearl with a smug smile.

"Uh..." Pearl was flabbergasted. "How... did you know that would work?"

"Well, if I were a shrimp, that's what I would do," Steven explained.

"You _are_ a shrimp," Amethyst countered.

Pearl huffed. "I just want everyone to know: my plan would have also worked."

* * *

The Crystal Gems continued their way up the stairs. Suddenly, Garnet held and arm out, stopping everyone. "Watch out!"

"A nearby wall had cracks that expanded and very quickly burst open, causing a rapid river of water to form in their path.

"What are we gonna do...?" Amethyst wondered. Spinel, Amethyst, Pearl, and Garnet simultaneously looked over to Steven expectantly.

"What? Me?" Steven questioned.

"Yeah," Spinel began, "Whatcha got for us, lil' S?"

"Cheeseburger backpack!" Spinel and Amethyst began chanting. "Cheeseburger backpack!

"Pearl, c'mon," Amethyst offered.

Steven rifled through his backpack as Pearl smiled a little, rolling her eyes. "Oh, alright."

Spinel, Amethyst, and Pearl resumed the chanting. Steven eventually found what he thought would be needed and pulled it out, putting it on display for everyone. "A raaaaft!" He pulled the handle and the raft inflated.

The gems wowed and Pearl smiled encouragingly. "Steven, that's so sensible!"

Steven threw the raft into the water and it very quickly started to drift away.

"Spinel!" Steven yelled.

"What, I told ya I can't use my powers here!" Spinel countered.

Everyone watched as the raft fell down a waterfall. Garnet quickly knocked down a nearby pillar, creating a bridge. "Good idea anyway, Steven."

"Yeah, they can't all be winners," Amethyst said. The gems began the rest of the trek up the staircase.

* * *

After a slightly tedious walk up, the group of five manage to reach the top floor. They approach the pedestal.

"This is it," Pearl began, "The Moon Goddess pedestal."

Spinel looked up into the sky. "The moon is almost overhead now! We still have enough time ta save this place and its history!"

"Steven," Garnet directed, "the statue."

Upon her command, Steven began rifling through his cheeseburger backpack. "Uhh, I..." he began, unsure of where he out the statue. He began searching each and every single compartment systematically.

"What's the hold-up?" Amethyst asked.

Steven looked up, horrified. "...I don't have it."

The gems gasp in shock.

"What!?" Pearl yelled.

"I must have left it on the bed!" Steven lamented.

Pearl worriedly looked overhead. "There's... there's no time..."

"Wait!" Steven exclaimed, rummaging through his backpack one last time, "I have an idea!" Steven pulled out Mr. Queasy.

"Could that work?" Amethyst inquired. The gems turned to Garnet. She shrugged.

Steven apprehensively approached the pedestal and carefully put Mr. Queasy on to it.

Everyone pleadingly looked to the toy, hoping it would work. The pedestal lit up in a ray of light extending from the moon. Mr. Queasy slowly floated up gent;y... and then began to vibrate. The gems gasped. Something was happening... But the toy exploded, causing everyone to yelp in surprise as the spire began to crumble. The vortex slowly ceased and shrunk.

"Everyone, keep steady!" Garnet ordered.

More and more of the spire crumbled away into the sea. Spinel took the time to wrap both her arms around everyone. She jumped up and began to use her legs as helicoptor blades, keeping all from sinking into the water.

Steven couldn't even look at the destruction. It was now all undersea. "This is all my fault. I broke it."

"No, Steven," Pearl reassured. "The Spire was falling apart when we got here."

"Ya did good under pressure and even got really creative, lil' S!" Spinel offered. "Ya did really, really swell!"

"Yeah, two out of four of your ideas worked," Amethyst praised. "That's fifty percent!"

"Yeah... I guess you're right," Steven admitted. "They can't all be winners."

Just then, the yellow raft popped up from underwater. Steven raised his arms into the air as Spinel dropped everyone onto the raft.

Spinel, Amethyst, and Pearl began chanting, "Cheeseburger backpack! Cheeseburger backpack! Cheeseburger backpack!"

"...It's a three-hour paddle home," Garnet noted.


	4. Together Breakfast

"Everyone’s out," Steven noted, opening the window to the sunrise. "Guess I’m making us breakfast." 

He began to gather ingredients, putting waffles, popcorn, whipped cream, and chocolate syrup on the counter. He inserted the waffles into the toaster one by one and created a stack of them on a plate. He poured the tasty syrup all over the waffles.

"Pearl? Spinel? Garnet? Amethyst...?" Steven asked, banging the door with the six-pointed star on it. "Is anyone home...?"

Receiving no answer, Steven went back to making his breakfast concoction, putting the popcorn into the microwave and turning it on. Once done, he poured it onto the stack of waffles.

"One... two... three... warp in!" Steven began, hoping that the gems would appear. Upon nothing happening, Steven sighed and flopped to the ground. "I guess they’re still out saving the world..."

Steven grabbed the whipped cream and sprayed a decent chunk of it on the waffles.

"Look at you," Steven began, appreciating his work so far, "you are out of control!"

Steven opened the front door and looked around, spotting Spinel quickly snaking her way along the sand towards the house. "Spinel!"

Upon hearing her name called, she sprung from the ground to the outside entrance. "Hey, Steven," she began, "What's up?"

"Come on," Steven responded, "come here! I made us breakfast!"

Spinel smiled. "Aww, ain't that swell! Let's eat."

Steven lead Spinel into the kitchen. "Oh, wait, wait, wait," Steven ordered. He rushed to the fridge, gathered a cherry, and placed it on top of the whipped cream. " _Ta-daaah_! It's a together breakfast!"

Spinel examined the... thing. Red flags went off in her head. Sure, waffles with syrup and whipped cream were fine, but putting popcorn on it was going way too far.

"Uh... I," Spinel began, "I get what you're going for, but I just remembered something. Sorry, lil' S, but I gotta go retrieve something for a friend and-"

"I'm a friend," Steven interrupted.

"A different friend," Spinel refuted. "I can't keep them waiting too long. You enjoy your... _thing_." Spinel began walking toward the star door.

"But it's a together breakfast," Steven lamented. "I can't eat it alone..."

"Don't worry, you won't," Spinel reassured. "Go... go find Amethyst. She'll eat it. She eats anything." With that, the star door opened up for Spinel. She entered and the door closed behind her.

Steven sighed, slumping down on the counter. The nearby warp pad lit up and Garnet appeared from it, carrying a scroll. "...Ah! Garnet, perfect!"

Steven picked up the together breakfast and showed it off to Garnet.

"Check it out," Steven began. "It’s not exactly healthy, but it’s in a stack, so I guess you could say it’s a... balanced breakfast?"

Garnet stared at Steven for a moment.

Garnet stared at Steven for a second moment.

Steven offered, "You know, like I made us all breakfast. I thought we could eat together. Like, like best buds!"

"I can’t stay," Garnet said. "There’s business to attend to inside the temple." Garnet opened up the star door.

"Aw, business?" Steven inquired, setting down the together breakfast. "Like what?"

"I have to burn this," Garnet responded. She unrolled the scroll, showing off an ominous abstract drawing.

"...Cool!" Steven exclaimed. He got his phone out and took a photo of the scroll.

Garnet immediately snatched the phone from Steven's hands. "I have to burn _this_ , too."

With that final message, Garnet entered and the star door closed behind her.

"No, my apps!" Steven lamented. With determination, Steven lifted his shirt up and pressed his gem on the star door. "Door. Open Door."

Nothing happened.

With a huff, Steven walked back over to the kitchen to lament with his together breakfast.

Suddenly, a wild purple policeman wielding a water gun appeared, kicking open the front door!

"Dumb Police!" Amethyst yelled. "Uhhh, you’re dumb!" She shot her water gun in the direction of the together breakfast.

Steven gasped. " **NOOOOOOOOO**!" He jumped in front of the together breakfast to protect it from the water stream.

Amethyst laughed, shapeshifting back into herself. "Oh man, I totally got you! You should’ve seen the look on your face!"

"I knew it was you," Steven responded. He got up and went to the closet, putting on a new shirt.

"Pfft, how?" Amethyst questioned.

"Because that’s a water gun," Steven explained, "and I’m not dumb."

"You’ve got something on your shirt," Amethyst pointed out.

Amethyst sprayed the water gun at Steven's dry shirt, triumphantly guffawing.

The star door opened from Amethyst's room and out stepped Pearl, carrying a sword.

"Hey, that’s _my_ door!" Amethyst ran up to Pearl.

"Oh, Amethyst," Pearl began, disdainfully, "there you are. Care to explain what one of my swords was doing in your room?

Amethyst rolled her eyes. "Having a sword party."

"Oh please, you took it," Pearl refuted.

"I did not!" Amethyst yelled.

"It’s fine," Pearl reassured. "It’s in the past, I forgive you."

"Ugh..." Amethyst uttered.

Pearl said, "Also, I cleaned up your awful, awful mess. You’re welcome."

Amethyst's eyes grew wide. "You did what!? I have a system!" She rushed into her room, the star door closing behind her.

"Amethyst, wait!" Steven shouted.

"What’s the matter, Steven?" Pearl asked.

"I wanted us all to have breakfast together," Steven explained. "So I made a together breakfast."

He showed it off for Pearl. "But everyone keeps leaving..." Steven lamented.

Pearl took one look and saw it was food. Nope. "Aww, that’s nice." She opened up the star door to her room and entered, disappearing into the water.

"Oh no, not you too!" Steven pleaded. He picked up the together breakfast and quickly made his way to the star door. "I can’t let this become together brunch."

Steven managed to stick his arm in the door before it fully closed.

* * *

With effort, Steven pried the door open enough for him to enter Pearl's room. He looked around. Pillars of waterfalls dotted the room. Pearl rises from a waterfall pillar, gracefully dancing as swords in scabbards revealed themselves. She replaced the swird she was holding into the empty scabbard.

"Hmm, there we go," Pearl declared, adjusting the sword so it was perfectly upright.

"...HEY, PEARL!" Steven shouted.

Pearl immediately noticed the young half-gem and a wave of panic shot through her. All of Pearl's swords fell down into the waterfall pillar.

"Steven!" Pearl began. "What are you doing in here? You know it’s dangerous for you inside the temple." She opened up the star door so Steven could leave.

Steven frowned. "We’re going to have a nice together breakfast, even if I have to get my shoes wet." He stepped into the water and sunk elbow-deep, holding the together breakfast above water desperately.

"What!? Get out of there!" Pearl admonished.

"I’ll swim it over to you," Steven began, shifting the together breakfast to one hand and paddling with the other towards Pearl. "See? Doggy paddle... forward!"

It was then Steven saw he was approaching the edge of the waterfall. "Oh gosh, wait!" He began panicking and trying his best to paddle back to shore, only to be sucked over the edge. "Doggy paddle, reverse! Reverse!"

"Steven!" Pearl yelped, hoping he could hear.

But Steven was too deep into the ride. The waterfall got steeper and steeper until it flowed at an unnatural angle. It began twisting and turning like a ribbon.

"...What the...?" Steven questioned.

Normally, Steven would enjoy something like this. It was like a super fun water slide... except he was holding something far too valuable.

"Keep it together, breakfast!" Steven shouted. Soon, he reached the end of the waterfall and washed up onto the shore.

* * *

Steven looked around, shifting the together breakfast from one hand to the other. The ground was sprouting various crystals and piles of junk and various objects were haphazardly dotted amongst the ground. Amethyst walked into view, picked up a pile of objects, and chucked it as far as she could.

"...Better," Amethyst concluded.

"Amethyst!" Steven exclaimed, approaching her.

"Oh, hey, Steven," Amethyst began. "Did you come down the waterfall? Pearl gets so mad that I have her junk, but it's always falling down here."

"Junk like what?" Steven questioned.

"Junk like... you!" Amethyst explained, hoisting Steven over her head. "Imma throw you in the junk pile!"

True to her word, Steven was thrown into a pile of junk, landing on a musty pillow.

Amethyst huffed. "Isn’t it awful? Pearl organized everything."

"Still looks messy to me," Steven noted.

"Aw, thanks. I try," Amethyst replied. She then noticed what Steven was holding. "Oh, what’s that, Steven?"

"It’s a together breakfast," Steven explained.

Amethyst smiled and reached out toward the delicious frankensteinian food. "Alright, snacks!"

Steven pulled the food away. "No! It’s for everyone to eat together. That’s the essence of together breakfast."

"Ooooooooooh..." Amethyst uttered. "Gimme, gimme!"

With renewed vigor, Amethyst began chasing Steven and his together breakfast. They both ran into a reddish passageway.

"We have to eat it together!" Steven ordered.

Amethyst wasn't listening. "You can’t outrun me! We both have short legs!"

* * *

Steven reached an open area. Various rock platforms stretched across. When he looked up, he saw the beginnings of what seemed to be a colorful obstacle course with floating shelves dottred across, containing various artifacts and books. Spinel was dangling by a leg on a trapeze. She noticed him.

"Huh?" Spinel began. "Lil' S, what are you doing back here? Be careful!"

Steven was about to answer, but Amethyst called out, "Steveeeeeen! I’m _hungryyyyyy_!"

Desperate, Steven jumped from platform to platform. "Just... hold... on...!" Steven quickly scanned the room and spotted another pathway. This one had a bunch of mysterious red tubes entering it.

"An exit!" Steven exclaimed, making a giant leap and landing, the together breakfast landing safely. "Skills!"

"Steven, no! Not that way," Spinel, pleaded, literally stretching her way down to the rocky platforms.

Amethyst jumped after Steven. "Get back here!"

Steven began running again. "You’re completely missing the point of this!" he rebuffed.

The gems chased Steven into another room that opened up. He jumped onto the red tube that poked out from a hole.

Amethyst froze and gained a look of caution. "Hey, wait a second!"

Spinel extended a giant palm, offering Steven to jump onto it. "Don't- just- just come with Amethyst and me."

"Steven!" Pearl began, arriving from another entrance. There you are!"

"Pearl! sweet! Three out of four."

Pearl became just as concerned as Amethyst and Spinel. "Oh, oh no! Steven! Be careful!"

"Why?" Steven inquired. "Wha...?" He looked up and saw what appeared to be a heart. Red tubes were flowing out from the top of it.

Steven only had one thing to say. "Woah..."

"You really shouldn’t be in here," Pearl warned, "this is the Crystal Heart. Oh...! It’s connected to the most dangerous areas of the temple!"

"That's why you need to jump onta my hand. And don't. Look. Down, lil' S," Spinel ordered.

Unfortunately, that was the absolute most wrong thing to say. Steven immediately looked down. He saw nothing but dark blackness and void. He immediately panicked and loosened his grip, beginning to slide down. Spinel made a grab for him, but it was too late.

"No!" Pearl yelped.

"Steven!" Spinel joined in.

* * *

"Aaaaah!" Steven yelled. "Where am I!?"

He slid down for quite a long moment before being stopped by the tube curving into a small bump. He was in another opened room and looked around. There, he saw various pink, white, purple, red, and brown bubbles floating about, each containing a gem. He heard footsteps and looked down, seeing Garnet approaching a bubbling well.

Garnet snapped Steven's phone in half and dumped it into the boiling well. She unrolled the scroll and touched it to the boiling water. It caught on fire and released what sounded like a shriek of pain. Garnet immediately put a brown bubble around it and smoke spread around in the bubble.

Steven slid the rest of the way to the ground, curious. Spinel, Amethyst, and Pearl reached the room and landed beside Steven.

Spinel whispered, "Don't bother Garnet right now."

Pearl whispered, "Steven, we’re getting you out of here."

Even Amethyst was whispering. "Come on."

Steven didn't take the hint and began yelping, "Ah, this is great! We’re all together!"

Garnet gasped, whipping her head to see Steven and the other gems. With Garnet distracted for a moment, the smoke seemed to try to escape the bubble. Fortunately, Garnet refocused and reclaimed the smoke.

"We can finally eat," Steven began. "I mean, we don’t have any forks, but we can use our hands! I’m not gonna judge."

Garnet saw the smoke try to escape once more and redoubled her effort to contain it. "Steven, go!"

"Okay, want to meet in the kitchen?" Steven asked.

Garnet was getting frustrated. She couldn't focus and the other gems needed to let her-

The bubble popped, releasing the smoke. It grew, its form constantly shifting and amorphous.

Amethyst, Pearl, and Garnet summoned their weapons, with Garnet ordering, "It’s trying to escape! Force it back!"

Garnet tried uppercutting the smoke. Amethyst whipped the smoke with her whip. Spinel wrapped her arms in loop around the smoke, but it just seeped through. "Swell..." Spinel complained.

Pearl thrust her spear into the smoke, trying to drive it into Garnet's gauntlet, only for the smoke to dart past everyone and into Steven, knocking him back. It then disappeared, as if it entered the together breakfast.

"Steven!" The gems shouted in unison.

The together breakfast twitched. Steven had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach. It twitched one last time before rapidly enlarging in size. Steven's together breakfast is now an amorphous monster. Yum.

"It’s taken refuge in organic matter!" Pearl noted. She threw her spear into the together monster. It responded in kind by blasting a chunk of whipped cream at her, driving her into a wall, where she stuck.

"Now it has all the power of a breakfast," Garnet noted. "We have to destroy it!"

Pearl screamed. "It’s horrible! I think some of it got into my mouth...!"

The together monster snapped the spear in half, causing it to dissipate. Spinel took the time to free Pearl from her whipped cream prison by enlarging her tongue and taking a single, long lick. Pearl, once freed, merely slid to the floor and trembled. It was a horrid experience for her.

"Get ya head in the game, Pearl!" Spinel began. "I know breakfast is da most important meal of the day, but I knew from the moment I laid my eyes on this that it was a horrible abomination against humankind! I mean popcorn on waffles!? Gross!"

Garnet tried to punch the together monster with her gauntlets, but they just got stuck in the goop.

"I didn’t want this..." Steven lamented. "I just wanted to eat together like... like best buds!"

"Steven," Garnet began as Amethyst tried pulling Garnet out of the goop. "You’ve got to get away!"

"But my breakfast!" Steven exclaimed.

The together monster shot a waffle at Garnet and Amethyst, sticking them in between a wall and the giant waffle, with Spinel just barely avoiding it. She groaned and enlarged herself to gigantic proportions.

"Alright, toots!" Spinel began. "Lemme show ya why I prefer a trip for biscuits instead!" With as much force as she could, she swung a gigantic fist at the together monster. Her fist slammed into a wall of syrupy popcorn, which shot out and completely buried the elastic gem. 

Steven couldn't take this anymore, his patience finally running out and desperation overwhelming him. "That’s... ENOUGH!" With a surge of strength, Steven got up and began to push the together monster to the boiling well.

" I..." Steven began, "don’t care if you... are the most important meal of the day...!"

The young half-gem pushed closer and closer. "I made you to bring us together... not to tear us apart!" Steven eventually managed to shove the together monster into the boiling well, causing it to completely disappear into a puff of flames.

Pearl got up from the ground and the other gems escaped from their culinary prisons, approaching Steven and worried with concern. Garnet stuck a hand into the bubbling water and pulled out a gem. She formed a bubble around it and tossed it alongside the other bubbled gems.

"I’m sorry guys," Steven apologized. "I guess I dreamed too big."

Spinel looked to the other gems and smiled.

* * *

Back in the kitchen, the gems recreated the together breakfast. Garnet set the waffles up, Amethyst made the popcorn, Pearl sprayed the syrup on, Spinel put the whipped cream on, and Steven put the cherry on top.

It was the new and improved together breakfast! This time with less monster.

"It looks great!" Steven noted. "It’s even more together and even more breakfast!"

The gems and Steven stared at the together breakfast. Doubts began to encompass each and every single one of them. Considering what just happened...

"I don’t think I can eat this," Steven complained.

Amethyst nodded. "Let’s order a pizza."

Steven and Spinel agreed, with them beginning to debate what toppings should be ordered.

"It did try to kill us," Garnet noted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I'd like to thank Moonshine210 for kudosing my work. It's both intimidating and flattering to have someone else with an even more extensive CG!Spinel fic than I do and I can only hope my fic can be a fraction as good as that one.
> 
> Second, as always, please comment with how you like my fic so far. I'd greatly like to know if there's anything I can improve upon. I'm even thinking of starting some original episodes, too. Also please point out any and all spelling and grammar errors.


	5. Frybo

Steven rifled through his haphazard pile of laundry, frowning. "Where are you...?" he asked himself.

Tsking at himself, he shook his head. "You're a mess, Steven."

Pearl approached the kitchen looking from place to place. It seemed as of she was also searching for something. "I know I had eight..." she mumbled to herself.

Just then, she turned to the human half-gem. "Hey, Steven, have you seen a Gem shard anywhere? It’s very important."

"No," Steven began, "have you seen my pants? They’re also very important."

Pearl frowned. I’m serious, Steven," Pearl began. "These Shards have a powerful partial consciousness that has been harnessed by Gems throughout history in order to create-"

By then, Steven's mind drifted to his own thoughts. Steven's pants weren't in the kitchen. Perhaps under the bed. No... Steven already looked there, too. Then Pearl walked in and- Pearl! Steven realized that he just tuned her out. She was really explaining something now. Something very important. The worst part about this was that Steven couldn't just start listening now. He's be lost. Just like his pants.

"-could become a monster," Pearl finished. "That’s why it’s very, very important it’s kept away from any kind of garment."

Pearl started walking to the door, the bubbled gems in hand, to exit the house. "If you see it, bring it to me, right away. I’m going to check in town and tell Spinel to help look for it," Pearl said.

Steven shouted, "For my pants?" Pearl couldn't answer. She already left. With no other recourse available, Steven decided to keep looking in the house.

As if on cue, Steven's pants walked into view and Steven's eye caught sight of them.

"THAT'S UNUSUAL!" Steven yelled.

The pants started to run away. With aplomb, Steven gave chase around the house. "Come on, we used to be friends," Steven explained. "We used to go everywhere together!"

Eventually, he managed to jump onto his pants, capturing them and gripping them as tight as he could. "Gotcha now, pants!" Steven declared.

Not wanting the pants to escape again, Steven struggled to put them on. First one leg, then the other, then fully putting them on. Success!

" _I_ wear the pants in this relationship!" Steven declared.

The pants still wiggled, trying to free themselves from being imprisoned on his body.

"What’s gotten into you?" Steven wondered. He put his hands in his pockets and felt something hard in one of them. Curious, he took it out and examined it.

"It’s a... thingie. Is this Pearl’s shard thingy?" Steven wondered. The shard attempted to take hold of Steven's shirt, but was held further away to prevent it from happening. Steven spotted a nearby sock and shoved the shard inside.

"Ha! Now who's smart?" Steven taunted. The shard in the sock responded by thwacking itself against Steven's face. Repeatedly. Until Steven commanded it to stop. Failing to resist his order, the sock froze.

"...Thanks!" Steven offered. He picked up his cheeseburger backpack and tossed the sock inside. "I gotta get you to Pearl."

He zipped the cheeseburger backpack and headed to town, his new mission now to locate where Pearl was.

* * *

As Steven started to pass by the Beach Citywalk Fries, he continued to call out for Pearl. "She must still be looking for my pants..."

Just as Steven stopped paying attention to where he was walking, he slammed into a white mascot figure. After being knocked to the ground, Steven noticed a human, Peedee, inside.

"Aah, _please help me_!" Peedee pleaded as seagulls malevolently harassed him. "Aah! No, get them _away_! Please! Aah!"

Spinel jumped in from nearby, her pinky finger forming a horn. She blew into it next to the seagulls, scaring them away. She was wearing a white headband with fake yellow fries poking out from the top.

"He ain't fries, ya mental seagulls!" Spinel yelled, grimacing. "Stars, I understand humans, but seagulls?"

"...Thanks, Spinel," Peedee breathed in relief, taking off the top half of the mascot costume. 

"Ya okay there?" Spinel asked Peedee.

Before he got a chance to answer, Mr. Fryman exited the fry shop to see what the commotion was. Renaldo was nearby, using his phone.

"Where’s your face, Frybo?" Mr. Fryman asked. "Being part of the Fryman family means you gotta sell fries. And be my son. Which you are."

Peedee sighs. "So," Mr. Fryman began, "you’re already halfway there. Keep at it, Frybo!"

With that, he reentered the fry shop and closed the door. Peedee was displeased. Spinel saw this.

"Look, as long as those seagulls stay away from you, you'll do fine," Spinel encouraged, adjusting her fry hat. "Keep up the great work!" Spinel offered a thumbs up and also went back inside.

"...When I told my dad," Peedee began, "I wanted to be part of the Fryman family business, I didn’t think it meant being stuck in a sweaty old costume." Peedee put the top of the Frybo costume back on.

"Things used to be different, Steven," Peedee continued, picking Steven off the ground. "Nothing to worry about back then except making myself dizzy on the old seahorse ride at Funland."

Steven gained a goofy grin. "Oh, Frybo, you’re hilarious."

A flash of anger entered Peedee, but quickly subsided into resignation. "I wish there was a way for this costume to do its job without me in it."

Steven's eyes lit up. "Maybe it can, Peedee. Maybe it can!"

* * *

After a lengthy half-hour of preparation, Steven was set. He had the Frybo costume on and the lyrics to the new fry song ready. He opened his mouth, cleared his throat, breathed in, and...

...was beset by a horde of seagulls. Steven ran around, screaming, trying to escape the seagulls.

* * *

After Steven escaped from the costume and the seagulls were gone, Peedee and Steven surveyed the damage. Frybo was definitely scuffed and scratched.

"...Wait!" Steven began, "I have another idea." Steven opened up his cheeseburger backpack and took the gem shard out of his sock, showing it off to Peedee before he tossed it inside the Frybo costume. The costume twitched once before it began to self-repair, taking out all the damages caused by the seagulls. Frybo began to roll around aimlessly on the ground.

"Woah..." Peedee uttered. This was amazing for him.

"Stop," Steven commanded. The Frybo costume obeyed.

A grin crossed Peedee's face. "Unbelievable... Get up!" Again, the Frybo costume obeyed.

"Do a little dance!" Steven commanded. The costume obeyed, forming legs out of fries and flopping around.

Mr. Fryman peeked out from the door to see how things were going. Peedee noticed and hid behind Steven. "Woah, all right," Mr. Fryman praised. "It’s about ti— I mean, good job, buddy! That’s what I’m talking about, Frybo, ha ha. Keep it up!" He offered a thumbs up and went back into the fry shop.

Peedee gripped Steven's shoulder, eyes lighting up and smiling widely. "Free! I’m free!" Peedee exclaimed.

He walked up to Frybo, offering a handshake. "You’ve got the job, Frybo! Let’s shake on it!"

Frybo obeyed, taking both of his hands, grasping Peedee's arms, picking him up, and shaking him. Steven couldn't help but giggle. "He’s got jokes!" Steven said.

Peedee was less enthused and wanted to get off this crazy ride. "Ok, no more shaking! Put me down...."

Frybo obeyed, dropping Peedee to the floor.

"Just... go... make people eat fries," Peedee ordered. Frybo obeyed, walking away.

Peedee laughed in excitement and gripped Steven's arm, rushing off to play. "Let's go be kids!"

* * *

The two reached the Funland Arcade. Steven put a quarter in the kiddy ride machines for the two of them. They both got on and enjoyed.

...But Peedee slowly realized that he wasn't actually enjoying the ride anymore. His soul was slowly being crushed by this realization.

"This seahorse used to make me so happy," Peedee lamented. "Now it’s just giving me whiplash. I feel like there’s just no point to it, you know what I mean?"

"I just feel tinglyYyYyYyYy!" Steven said.

Peedee sighed. "You’ll understand when you have a job."

"I do have a job," Steven rebutted. "I protect humanity from magic and monsters and stuff!"

"I mean a real job that you get paid for," Peedee corrected. "Like the ones Spinel does."

Steven reached an arm into the air dramatically and said, "I'm paid in the smiles across the town’s faces."

"I don’t see anyone smiling..." Peedee began. "You pick up a job to buy a house, or raise kids, or to... impress your dad.... You work away your life, and what does it get you?"

"Smiles on faces?" Steven offered.

"No," Peedee rejected. "You get _cash_. Cash that can’t buy back what the job takes... not if you rode every seahorse in the world." He sighed dejectedly.

Steven felt as if his mind was opened. "Woah..." he began, surmising that seahorses won't work. "Wanna try the jellyfish?"

Before Peedee could answer, a distant scream was heard. "That came from the fry shop!" Peedee exclaimed. The two got off the rides and ran to see what caused the scream.

* * *

Steven and Peedee soon reached Beach Citywalk Fries. When they got there, they saw people fleeing the building. A few yellow tendrils emerged from the door and snatched a few of the people, dragging them back inside.

Peedee gripped the sides of his head, panicked. "We didn’t tell him to do that, did we tell him to do that!?"

Before an answer could be provided, a table was defenestrated through the fry shop front window. The two kids looked through it to witness what exactly had been happening. They saw Frybo had people gripped in his fry tentacles, Spinel among them.

"Are ya mental!?" Spinel yelled, gripping the tendril that held her and summoning her gem weapon. "Put us down! Enough with the fries!"

Frybo didn't obey, directly shoving fistfuls of fries into Spinel's gullet.

"Frybo, _stop_!" Steven ordered. Frybo merely caught Steven in a slow gaze. It was a very unsettling sight which caused the two kids to flinch.

Frybo threw Lars at them. They managed to duck in time, causing Lars to hit the table and flop to the ground. He spat out the fries that were in his mouth and got up. "I don’t even like fries!" He yelled, running away.

"Why isn’t he listening!?" Peedee demanded.

"I don’t know!" Steven answered."

Mr. Fryman opened up the door wearily. "Peedee! Where’s all this coming from!?" He was grabbed by a fry tentacle and started being slowly dragged closer to Frybo.

"Aah, I get it!" Mr. Fryman began. "I pushed you too hard! I thought you wanted to be as good a Fryman as you could be!"

"Fryman..." Spinel said.

"You’re a tough kid for putting up with it as long as you did!"

"Fryman, that-" Spinel began.

"The truth is," Mr. Fryman interrupted, not listening to Spinel, "you’re a valued member of Fryman Brothers Incorporated and all its affiliates...!"

Spinel rolled her eyes and sighed.

Peedee's eyes widened, stunned and touched by his father's words. He yelled for his father whilst Frybo shoved fries into Mr. Fryman's mouth. Peedee tried to jump through the window, but Steven grabbed onto him, stopping him in his tracks.

"No!" Steven ordered. "He’ll mash your potatoes!"

"What are you going to do...?" Peedee inquired.

"My job!" Steven proudly exclaimed.

Spinel, meanwhile, had managed to cut some of the fry tentacles and threw Mr. Fryman to safety. Unfortunately, he ended up landing on both Steven and Peedee. The two of them managed to escape when Spinel and Frybo slammed into the front window area, Spinel's arms wrapped around Frybo. She lifted him up and smashed him into the ground, retracting her arms after.

"Steven!" Pearl yelled from nearby, carrying her bubble full of shards. "Did you put my missing shard in that fry costume?"

"Yeah, he did!" Spinel answered, traversing through the broken front window.

"Didn’t you hear," Pearl pleaded, "what I said about the living armor and infantries and many, many deaths!?"

"Oh Steven..." Pearl frowned. She summoned her spear weapon, did a little acrobatic flourish and thrust her spear into the eye of Frybo. It responded in kind by firing a massive spout of ketchup and mustard. From its eye. The force hit Pearl and she fell to the ground, dropping the bubble of shards. It fell to the ground and popped, leaving the gems laying on the ground.

Spinel noticed this and gasped. "No, you don't!" She was quick to act, forming her legs into a spring and springing toward the gems,. She managed to get there as Steven approached them and bubbled them, tossing them over to Mr. Fryman. "Make sure it don't pop!"

Spinel then turned to Pearl, who was shaking in disgust. Spinel rolled her eyes. "Come on, I know you're anything but aces, but ya gotta work on your condiment resistance!"

"Spinel!" Steven began. "The shards! We can use the shards against Frybo!"

"Steven, _no_ ," Spinel shot down. "I can do this _without_ the shards."

Frybo had approached Peedee and Fryman when Spinel extended her arm, grabbed the spear stuck in its eye, and tore it out. Spinel grinned as she performed an incredible flourish. "Come at me, small potatoes. I'mma drop ya like your hot."

Now distracted by Spinel, Frybo slowly turned and got ready to whip a fry tentacle at her. Seizing the opportunity, Peedee grabbed a broken plank and bashed Frybo with it.

"Go away!" Peedee yelled. "You are awful! I hate you, I’ve always hated you!"

"Wait," Mr. Fryman questioned, "you’ve always hated Frybo...?"

"Peedee, run!" Spinel yelped, Springing into and stabbing Frybo in between the eyes. Peedee did as ordered as the Frybo costume spurted out more ketchup and mustard, this time at Spinel. She, however, knew it was coming. Thanks to her extremely elastic body, she rubber banded herself to cleanly avoid being sprayed back. With a growl and a yell, Spinel lifted Frybo up into the air and slammed it on the ground. She did not stop the motion, pinning the costume to the ground. Frybo tried fighting back against Spinel's strength.

"...Steven! The shard!" Spinel ordered.

"R- right...!" Steven answered, running up to Frybo. He inserted a hand into Frybo's mouth and felt around. Once he felt the shard, he grasped it and used a mighty tug in order to pull it out. Frybo fell inert.

Pearl got up to her knees and blindly felt Mr. Frybo's face. "Steven, are you alright?" she asked.

"...I'm fine," Mr. Fryman answered.

Spinel sighed, allowing the spear to dissipate. She shot a glance at Pearl and shook her head. "I'll go get some napkins."

* * *

The group was gathered at the beach. Mr. Fryman, Pearl, Spinel, and Renaldo carried the box containing Frybo into the shallow shore and set it down. They backed away as Mr. Fryman gave a solemn frown.

"You were great, Frybo," Mr. Fryman eulogized. "The kids today just didn’t understand. Now, they never will."

Pearl asked, "Weren’t people scared of it before he attacked them?"

"Yeah," Spinel answered.

Steven shushed both of them.

"It’s time..." Mr. Fryman began, "to send him off." He took a lighter from his apron pocket and used it to set Frybo on fire. Pearl, using the end of her spear, pushed the burning mascot out to sea. Mr. Fryman sighed.

"As greasy in death..." he began, "as he was in life."

"Dad? Uh,... I'll..." Peedee began. He paused, not sure what to say. He eventually settled on a question. "Are you going to get another costume?"

"I don’t need another Frybo," Mr. Fryman began. He pulled Peedee to his side, resolute with pride. I got... the Fry Man."

Renaldo joined in on the hug. " _We_ got the Fry Man!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried something a little different for this chapter. I don't know if it's any good or not, but here it is. Please comment and tell me what you think.


	6. Cat Fingers

Greg grabbed the hose as Steven continued scrubbing the vehicle with a rag. Greg said, "Almost done! Steven, get the hubcaps."

"Hubbing it up!" Steven responded, vigorously scrubbing the hubcap.

"Hub it good," Greg ordered, rinsing the suds off of the vehicle. "This is a high-profile job."

"You mean cause it's the mayor's election-mobile?" Steven asked.

"If we do this right, we might get political favors," Greg explained.

"I'm not sure what that is, Steven sais, grabbing another nearby hose and turning it on, "but I like it!

The force of the water current caused the water from Steven's hose to shoot over the MayorMobile and land on Greg. He gasped in surprise before almost immediately recovering and pointing his own hose at Steven. Thus the water fight between father and son began. Just as quickly as it started, it ended when Mayor Dewey approached.

"Hey, hey, hey! I'm not paying for father-son bonding here!" he admonished. His admonishment was met with a jet of water from Steven's hose spraying him. "Universe! Control that kid."

Greg rushed over and ruffled Steven's air. "I'm sorry, Mayor Dewey. Hehehe, this one's on the house."

Mayor Dewey approached the car to inspect it. "On the house, eh?" He began, appreciating how clean the car was. "I like the way you do business, Universe."

With a grin, Mayor Dewey entered his car, started it up, and drove off. The MayorMobile chanted its owners name as it disappeared from sight.

Greg groaned, the crisis mostly averted. Steven popped up next to him basically giving jazzhands. " _Political favors_...!"

Greg couldn't stay dismayed and locked his son into a noogie. "Ah, you rascal! Enough with the hose fights!"

"Aw, okay," Steven giggled back.

The two were suddenly splashed by a jet of water.

"What the...?" Greg questioned.

The duo turned to find a purple cat holding a hose in its mouth. The cat smiled as it sprayed and continued to spray them with the hose, chasing them around.

"What is with this cat...?" Greg wondered.

The cat answered the question by shapeshifting into who was obviously the culprit. Which was Amethyst. She chuckled a little. "Haha! Got you guys!"

"Amethyst!" Steven exclaimed, stars in his eyes.

Greg was less enthused. "Heh, pretty cool. Amethyst," Greg managed, his spine uncomfortably getting chills.

" _Really_ cool!" Steven admired. "I wish I could shapeshift like you."

Amethyst tied the hose she was carrying into a knot. "You could probably learn."

"Really...?" Steven inquired.

"Sure," Amethyst lifted Steven's shirt. "You've got a gem."

Greg's mind, body, and soul collectively cringed. "Uh! Magic stuff! Should I get out of here? Is there going to be an explosion...?"

Steven pulled his shirt back down. "Aww, it's no big deal, dad."

Amethyst shapeshifted into Steven. "Yeah, it's _fuuuuuuuuun_."

Greg gasped, wanting to turn 360 degrees and walk away. Really fast.

* * *

"Hey Pearl!" Amethyst said, her and Steven back at the house. She transformed into a seal as Spinel and Pearl looked over. Spinel saw Steven giggle.

"Do more!" Steven ordered.

With a grin, Spinel stretched her body to have it shapeshift into a wolf. She let out a nice howl. Amethyst lit up and shapeshifted into a musclebound, hulking masked wrestler. Spinel stretched her body into what appeared to be a gumball machine whilst Amethyst shapeshifted into a purple Blue Jay.

Pearl frowned. "Spinel, Amethyst, you're overdoing it."

"Uh, chill it _duuuuuude_ ," Amethyst retorted.

Spinel twirled once in place, stretching her body into an anthropomorphic rabbit. "Yeah, what's the hubbub, bub?"

"Just because you two can shapeshift, doesn't mean you should," Pearl explained.

"Technically, I'm not," Spinel rebutted.

Steven turned to Pearl. "Can you shapeshift?" he inquired.

"Of course I-" Pearl started.

Amethyst shapeshifted into Pearl and interrupted her. "Well of course I can, I'm _perfect_!" She then stuck her rear end out with gusto and smacked it a couple times. " **WOMP WOMP**!"

This caused Pearl to groan and shove Amethyst away. Spinel stretched herself back to normal.

"All Gems have shapeshifting powers, lil' S," Spinel explained.

Pearl interjected, "We can turn into objects," Pearl projected a tea kettle from the gem on her forehead, "we can change parts of our bodies," Pearl projected a human figure growing a large hand.

"Ya can tell someone's shapeshifting when the glow," Spinel explained. "My stretchy powers are different." Spinel shrugged.

"Or," Pearl began, "we could do... that." She glanced at Amethyst, who had her butt stuck out again, slapping it again.

" **WOMP WOMP**!" Amethyst yelped. Pearl groaned.

"I want to try it all!" Steven exclaimed.

"Hold up there, lil' S, don't bite off more than you can chew."

Amethyst WOMP WOMPed for a third time, Pearl groaned and left the house in disgust.

"Alright!" Steven began. "Show me how to change into a, uh, huge lion!"

Amethyst shapeshifted back into herself. "Actually, for once, Pearl and Spinel are right. If you're gonna do this, you've gotta start with something easy."

"Like that cat you turned into...?" Steven questioned.

"Sounds swell to me!" Spinel encouraged.

"Now," Amethyst began, "follow my lead." She took a few steps backward, lightly cupping the sides of her head. "First, think of what you wanna be, and then, just... shake it out!"

To demonstrate, Amethyst loosely shook her body, then shapeshifting into a cat.

"See?" Spinel asked. "Like that. Your turn, lil' S!" Spinel gave an encouraging thumbs up.

"Okay," Steven stared. He concentrated hard, imagining himself turn into a feline. "Caaaaaaat..."

"Nah, you're too tense," Amethyst said, still a cat, opening a bag of chips. Spinel sat down beside her.

"Ya gotta relax, lil' S," Spinel explained. "Shake and feel it."

"Bio-rhythms, yo," Amethyst exclaimed, shoving a potato chip into her mouth.

Steven pressed his fingers against his temples. "Feeeeeel iiiiit..."

Spinel rubbed the back of her head. "Eeh, if ya not ready, we can try later."

"No, wait," Steven ordered. "I can do it."

Amethyst shapeshifted back into herself as Steven began to shake and wiggle his arms loosely. With a final flourish, he thrust both of his hands out.

...Nothing seemed to have happened. Spinel frowned in pity. Amethyst grinned and got up off the floor.

"Well, it was a good try," Amethyst reassured.

As if on cue, a faint meow came from one of Steven's hands. Curiously, he looked closer. Lo and behold, a single cat head was on the tip of Steven's finger. Amethyst grinned wide, as did Spinel whilst Steven now had stars in his eyes.

"This is so _cool_!" Steven explained.

"You should go show your dad," Amethyst offered. "He's gonna freak out!"

"Oh! Oh!" Spinel began, her eyes alight with delight. "Ronaldo, too! I have to see what he comes up with!"

* * *

Greg was lazing about in front of his car wash, catching some nice, warm sun. Steven came running up to him.

"Dad, I'm back!" Steven exclaimed. Greg too off his sunglasses.

"Hey Schtuball," Greg greeted.

Steven grinned. "Check it out!" He proudly revealed his cat finger. It meowed.

Freaked out, Greg spazzed a bit and flung his water bottle. Some water dropped on the cat finger and it hissed in pain.

"I shapeshifted my finger into a cat!" Steven explained.

"Whoa!" Greg exclaimed, his stomach beginning to knot up. He doesn't like this. He REALLY doesn't like this. Greg cautiously asks, "Is, is that a thing you can do now? That's pretty... cool."

"I know, right!?" Steven agreed. "I'm gonna take this show on the road!"

As Steven left, he giggled and twirled, happily listening to his cat finger meow repeatedly.

* * *

"That'll be $1.05, Steven," Sadie said.

Steven fetched a nickel out of his pocket and put it on the counter of the Big Donut.

"Mm, okay. Here's a nickel," Steven began. He lifted up his other hand. The cat finger was holding a rolled-up dollar in its mouth. "And a buck!"

"WHAAAAAT!?" Lars and Sadie yelped in unison. The cat finger dropped the dollar onto the counter and meowed.

"Oh Steven, that's adorable!" Sadie exclaimed. She began to pet the cat finger. It purred in return. "Are... you making it purr?"

"It kinda does what it wants," Steven explained.

"Really?" Lars questioned. He poked at the cat finger, It bit him, causing Lars to yelp out in pain.

"See what I mean?" Steven offered. He turned his attention to admonish the feline finger. "Bad cat finger!"

"Oh, I'm sure it just wants to play," Sadie reassured.

Steven gasped. "You're right! And he doesn't have any friends."

"Oh my _gosh_ ," Lars mocked. "It's just like _you_ , Steven."

Steven took a step back, breathed in deep, and began to loosely shake his arms. With a flourish, he turned all the other fingers and thumb on his hand into cat fingers. Steven showed it off triumphantly. Lars and Sadie looked both shocked and amazed... and weirded out.

* * *

Steven rushed up to the counter for Citywalk Fries.

"Hey, Peedee!" Steven began. "Whoa, you work the deep-fryer now?" 

Peedee nodded, smiling.

Steven slammed his fist on the counter. "Make me some fry bits!" he ordered.

"Steven, I take my job seriously, please use the actual menu," Peedee directed.

"Give me the bits!" Steven rebutted. He slammed his fist onto the counter. "The bits!"

"Alright listen," Mr. Fryman began. "It'll be over sooner if you just give him what he wants."

Peedee sighed, annoyed, and went to collect the fry bits.

"Whoa, hey, hey, it's not for me," Steven explained. He revealed the hand that was full of cat fingers. "It's fo' these guyyyyys!"

"What the-" Mr. Fryman uttered.

Peedee returned with the bits. "Uh, here's your-" Peedee started. He was very startled to see the cat fingers. "... bits."

Steven lowered his cat finger hand near the bits. They began munching away happily.

"I can't look away..." Mr. Fryman admitted.

"Steven, that is _freakish_ ," Peedee uttered.

"No, it's not. It's natural," Steven rebutted.

To prove his point, he loosely shook his other arm. "Shake... it... out!" With a flourish, all the fingers and thumb on his remaining hand turned to cat fingers.

"See?" Steven offered.

"You know who would love this?" Mr. Fryman asked Peedee. "Your older brother." He turned and called out, "Yo Ronaldo!"

Ronaldo walked nearby, carrying a box of fry supplies. "What's up dad?" he asked.

That was when he noticed Steven had cats for fingers. He dropped his box, let out an excited scream, and rushed over to the counter.

"I've _gotta_ take a pic for Keep Beach City Weird!" he exclaimed. He excitedly took his phone out and took a picture of the cat fingers as fast as he could.

"It's my blog," Ronaldo exposited. "Keep! Beach! City! Weird!"

Peedee groaned. Ronaldo flailed his arms around a little. "Wh- Spinel likes it!"

"Can I see the picture?" Steven asked. Ronaldo held the phone out for Steven. He grasped it, causing the cat fingers to start angrily hissing. Shocked, he dropped the phone.

"Yikes!" Steven yelped. "Sorry guys. I guess cat fingers don't function well as... fingers."

* * *

Steven opened up the fridge in his house. "Shh," Steven ordered to his cat fingers. "I'm just getting a snack!"

He tried pulling a sandwich out, but the cat fingers hissed even more.

"Steven!" Amethyst called out from just outside the window. "Need some help?"

Steven managed to pick the plate the sandwich was on with his elbows. "Nah, it- it's cool."

"Oh gooood! See ya later then," Amethyst said.

"Huh?" Steven questioned.

"We're taking the Gem Sloop out to sea to fight a living island," Amethyst explained.

"What?" Steven began, accidentally dropping the plate to the floor. "Uh, Amethyst, wait!"

Steven ran after Amethyst, calling out, "I wanna go on the Gem Sloop! I wanna see a living island! Wait! Wait, wait!"

Steven entered the water, not caring is his clothes got wet. He really wanted to go on a mission and Spinel, Garnet, Pearl, and Amethyst were already sailing away without him.

"Steven!" Pearl called out.

Amethyst guffawed. "C'mon, you can make it!"

Steven inserted his hand into the water with the intent to swim over, but the cats basically started yelping in pain and distress. Steven instinctively took his hand out of the water. The gems immediately spotted it.

The gems collectively gasped.

"The heck!?" Spinel uttered.

"Steven!" Pearl exclaimed. "What's going on?"

"I- it's nothing!" Steven explained. "I... I just turned all my fingers into cats!"

Amethyst snorted in laughter.

"We have to stay and help Steven!" Pearl pleaded. Garnet was silent for a few moments.

"Look, Steven!" Spinel called out. "Just shake yaself back into bein' Steven!"

"We can't all go," Garnet explained. "This is a tectonic emergency. Spinel, you stay."

Spinel whopped her head over to Garnet as a flash of hurt was briefly displayed in her eyes.

"Wh- but... You need me, don't ya?" Spinel questioned.

"Us three can handle it," Garnet justified.

"Spinel!" Pearl called out. "Make sure you treat Steven carefully!" Pearl yelled out.

The two went back into the house as Spinel grumpily sighed.

"Okay so... no more cat fingers," Spinel ordered. "Just Steven fingers. Let loose and shake 'em."

Steven looked at his cat fingers. "...And she doesn't mean little me heads on fingers. She means my regular fingers!"

With a deep breath, Steven began to concentrate, putting a palm on his forehead and imagining his cat fingers turning back into regular fingers.

Spinel crossed her arms. "...Aaaand feel. I swear, it's like the others don't tru-"

Spinel was interrupted by a meow coming from Steven's forehead. Spinel raised her brows and Steven moved his hand. There was a cat head on Steven's forehead. The poor half-gem freaked out and fell to the floor, landing on one of his arms.

"Steven," Spinel began, raising her hands into the air, "Calm down. Shake and feel."

Steven moved to get up, revealing that his hand got fully turned into a cat head. Steven yelped in surprise.

"Steven, just- just calm down!" Spinel ordered. Steven's right foot transformed into a cat head, causing Steven to fell onto the floor. Spinel gripped the sides of her head with a strained smile.

"Spinel! It's..." Steven exclaimed, "It's not working Help!"

"Steven, just..." Spinel's mind raced with what exactly to do. More and more cats were appearing on Steven and Spinel couldn't gather the Crystal Gems. Spinel didn't get it. Her mind struggled. Shapeshifting was always one of the first things gems learned, gem-power-wise. It came so naturally to them. But... Steven wasn't all-gem. Could that be what was messing things up? Could that be what was making them worse? But what could Spinel do to help with the human side of-

Spinel's mind froze when she realized exactly who to go to. "...Deadbeat."

* * *

Greg was happily singing, listening to music through his headphones, as he washed the outside of his car wash. Suddenly, he heard the faint noise of something crashing. He took his headphones off and looked around.

"Hello? Who's there?" Greg questioned.

"It's me," Spinel answered, stepping into the light of a streetlamp. Her face seemed very worried and somewhat pained.

"Spinel?" Greg began, confused. "We're closed. You can come back tomor-"

It was then Greg noticed the weird catlike blob thingy that Spinel was carrying around, wrapped up in one of her arms. The cat heads were trying to bite through the arm, but to no avail. Greg screamed and sprayed the hose at the weird monster thing. It recoiled and shrunk, causing Spinel to lose her grip of it.

"Daaaaad...!" Steven cried out, the cat heads reducing just enough to show that it was indeed Steven.

Greg gasped, horrified and confused. "...Steven...?"

"Yeah..." Spinel confirmed.

"Dad!" Steven called out, his eyes beginning to tear up. "Help!" The cat heads were beginning to retake their hold on Steven. "The cat fingers are taking over my body!"

Spinel looked between Greg and Steven, nervously hoping for a recovery, but things just seemed to be getting worse. The gems cast her away for something that's supposed to be so simple, and here she is, screwing up. She wasn't made for this. "...I don't wanna play anymore..." Spinel mumbled to herself, gripping one of her arms. Will the other Crystal Gems kick her out and abandon her for this...? Spinel shivered at that thought.

"Hold on!" Greg ordered, dropping his hose and running up to Steven. "I'll get you out of there!"

Greg attempted to tear the cats off of Steven. One of them responded by painfully biting Greg's arm and tossing him away.

"No! Bad!" Steven admonished. "Bad cat fingers!"

The cats controlling Steven's body began to walk away and stepped into a nearby puddle. This caused them to freak out and jump on the corner of the roof of the car wash.

Greg looked over to Spinel. "Can't you make them go away?"

Spinel snapped out of her trance just in time to answer, "We- we tried, but it made it worse!"

"Oh, my life is over!" Steven lamented. "I can't go on magic adventures! I can't even open the fridge! And I'll never get to have another water fight with you, Dad! Because these things hate-" Steven's mind froze. He just realized the cats' weakness. "Water! They hate water! Dad, spray me again!"

Greg wordlessly did as commanded and sprayed Steven with water. The cats growled in distress and controlled Steven's body to jump off the roof. They then attempted to assail the one spraying them in order to make it stop. Spinel summoned her gem weapon. She really didn't have to want to use this. At all. Steven managed to stop the cats by latching onto the edge of the car wash.

"It's not enough water!" Steven yelled. He looked around, hoping to find anything. What he saw was the inside of the car wash. He gasped, having an idea. "Turn on the super-wash!"

"No, I won't do it!" Greg denied. "It's too dangerous!"

"You've got to! I'm a monster!" Steven yelled. "I'm an adorable cat monster!"

"No you're not! You're my _son_!" Greg reprimanded, his eyes tearing up.

Spinel grabbed Greg's tank top by the collar, ripped him away from the ground, and lightly slammed Greg into the wall of the car wash. "He ain't gonna _be_ your son much longer if this keeps up! Don't abandon him when he needs you the most! Like right now!"

" **DAAAD**!" Steven yelled.

Spinel was desperate. Very desperate. "...Either you do it or I will! Your choice, _deadbeat_ ," Spinel said coldly.

Greg looked from Spinel to Steven. After a moment to stop freaking out entirely, he swatted away Spinel's grip, dropping to the floor. He then rushed over to the controls of the car wash and started it.

Steven then began to fight for his life and against the cats. He passed the window while a horrified and worried Spinel and Greg were behind. He fought to control his body as much as he could, but it was so hard... so difficult. He barely could. Steve stood still to get hit by the pressurized water jutting out from the car wash hoses. He fought with everything he had to in order to walk through the scrubbers. He needed to control his body enough to go through the pressurized water rinsers at the end.

And with the car wash finished. Greg and Spinel rushed over to the exit. There, lay a Steven without a cat in sight. Greg let loose one of the biggest sighs of relief he ever managed while Spinel fell to her knees, trembling.

"Dad..." Steven weakly began. "We did it." Steve got up, his clothes in tatters.

Greg laughed in relief and hugged his son. Steven began laughing in relief, too.

"...I... I was no help at all," Spinel noted, frowning.

"That's not true, Spinel!" Greg said.

Spinel looked up, surprised. "Huh?"

"You bought Steven here to me," Greg began. "Without you doing that, _who knows_ where he'd be?" He rushed up and hugged Spinel as well. She was taken aback by this, not knowing what to do.

"We probably would have lost Steven for good of you didn't bring him here," Greg ended.

Spinel's mind span for a moment before she smiled and hugged back, "Yeah... yeah, you know, you're right. ...But ya still a deadbeat."

* * *

Steven and Spinel sat next to each other on the pier by the house. The other gems approached. Spinel had the briefest flash of jealousy in her eyes as the boat pulled up alongside the raft.

"Steven!" Pearl exclaimed. "Okay, let me see it." Pearl then quickly analyzed Steven's hands. Not one cat was on them.

"Y- you got them to go away...!" Pearl noted.

Spinel gained a sly grin. "Yeah. Steven practically figured out how to change back himself."

She looked straight at Garnet. "There wasn't really much need for me ta stay behind, Garnet." The two of them locked themselves into a brief staring contest.

Garnet looked to the others after a moment. "It goes to show you should have a little more faith in Steven."

"Yeah," Steven began, "that would have been a total CAT-tastrophe!"

Amethyst gave off a dry, sarcastic laugh as Pearl giggled momentarily. Spinel, on the other hand, gained a big smile and stifled some laughter.

"Hey, he's feeling much better MEOW!" Spinel said. The gems were unimpressed.

"What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?" Steven asked.

"Okay, that's enough," Garnet said. Amethyst, Pearl, and Garnet waked back over to the house to enter it.

"Aww, don't be a pill! Lil' S is FELINE fine. Everything's PURRfect!" Spinel said, twirling in place and making her face catlike.

"Oh come on!" Steven playfully admonished. We're just KITTEN around!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took a huge risk here and changed near the end a little. Please tell me whether or not I'm shoehorning in Spinel too much. And please comment on whether or not you like this fanfic as a whole. I could really use criticism.


	7. Funky Flow

Steven gripped his blue bike by the handlebars, safely corralling it down the stairs and into the sand. A small tremor shook the area, startling Steven. He lost his grip on the bike and chased after it. The germs approach the house from nearby.

"I don't think they are earthquakes," Pearl theorized, raising her arms up. "They're too frequent."

The blue bike fell down into the sand and was noticed by Amethyst. "Hey, look! Steven's got a bike."

Steven rushed and picked it up.

"Where ya headin', lil' S?" Spinel asked.

"Just out for a ride," Steven explained.

"In the sand?" Pearl questioned.

"Yup!" Steven responded. He hopped on his bike and slowly peddled away, grunting with exertion. He briefly looked up and saw a girl. It was Connie and he was going to try to impress her. He eventually reached a few feet away from the water of the beach and parked his bike.

"Some smooth ride," Steven uttered out loud. He looked back at the girl. She had her face shoved into a book.

"Five speeds," Steven tried again. Nothing. "Handbreaks... Electric blue finish with a tiger bell..." Each time ended in failure. Steven rang the bell on his bicycle to try and catch the girl's attention. Still nothing.

"I bet there are a lot of kids who'd love to ride this bike," Steven bragged. He attempted to mount his bike to show off some more, but he and his bike fell to the sand with an ungraceful thud. When Steven looked to the girl. she was now looking at him, confused. He glanced to his bike before he ran off, throwing his bike helmet to the ground and yelling in embarrassment.

* * *

Steven slammed the door closed behind him, panting and reeling from his miserable failure. He turned his head to see the four gems next to the window, staring at him.

"...What up?" Steven inquired.

"Who were you talking to?" Pearl asked.

"Huh?" Steven uttered.

"That girl," Garnet clarified.

"You saw?" Steven asked, beginning to blush.

"She's just a girl I know," Steven explained, "except she doesn't know me. We've never talked."

Amethyst gasped in delight, running to Steven and cupping his cheeks with her hands. "You like her!"

"Uh," Steven began, "I like everyone." He pushed Amethyst's arms away.

"Let's set up a play-date!" Pearl gushed. "I'll write up an invitation and work out a schedule. Oh! We'll have to find out her favorite kind of tea..."

"No," Garnet rebutted. "Just talk to her."

"Yeah, you'd be surprised how easy it is to make friends that way, lil' S," Spinel offered.

"Okay," Steven said. He pointed at the gems. "But you guys can't watch this time! It'll mess up my funky flow."

Spinel snrked in amused laughter, holding a hand to her mouth. Pearl and Amethyst were less enthused and more confused.

"Funky... flow...?" the two of them parroted.

Garnet adjusted her visor. "We won't watch."

"Alright!" Steven exclaimed. He ran to the fridge and gathered a bracelet-like object from the freezer, then running to the door of the house.

"What's that?" Amethyst asked.

"Nothing!" Steven responded, managing to exit the house before anything else could be said or asked.

The gems stared at the door for a few seconds before Pearl started making her way to the door. She was blocked by a giant pink hand.

"And where do ya think you're going, toots?" Spinel questioned.

Pearl attempted and failed to gain a pink smile. "Oh, I was just- just... um... going... to... to scour the area for other gems!"

"A likely story," Spinel shot down. "But ya gonna have to try harder than that."

Pearl frowned a little whilst Amethyst giggled and attempted to defenestrate herself. She was grabbed by Garnet. "We promised him we wouldn't watch."

"Hey!" Amethyst struggled. " _You're_ watching right now!"

"I am not," Garnet rebutted.

"Sooo... Spinel," Pearl began.

"Don't try it," Spinel responded.

"You know how you like meeting new people...?" Pearl tempted.

Spinel leaned up against the wall next to the door, putting her hands casually behind her head. "Yeah, and?" Spinel looked unamused.

"Do you know anything about her?" Pearl questioned. "You could gain a new friend!"

Spinel shrugged. "Eh, I can wait another thousand years."

Pearl looked incredibly shocked. "I-... um... but... you... you'll be abandoning her...!"

Garnet walked over and picked Pearl up by the back of her neck. "Do not make fun of Spinel." She then walked toward the star door, it opening to the burning room.

"Garnet, wait!" Spinel ordered. Garnet looked to Spinel.

She got a phone out of her gem and stretched her hand, placing it on Garnet's afro. "Just in case they try to escape."

Garnet said nothing. A tremor shook the area as Garnet entered the room, the phone not falling down.

* * *

Spinel had set up the card game Aviculture to play against herself. She had two birds in the river and two birds in the forest on one mat and three birds in the plains and one in the river on the other. Just as she rolled the dice, a purple Garnet walked out from the door. Spinel quickly glanced up before returning her most of her attention to the game.

"What's up, Garnet?" Spinel asked.

"Steven is in danger," the purple Garnet replied. "Want to help come save him?"

"Nah," Spinel declined. "I'm really inta this game. Ya go on without me."

The purple Garnet pursed her lips, taking a moment to stare at Spinel collect two of the rat dice and reroll the others. The purple Garnet then went to the door and was greeted with Spinel's trap: a boxing glove that when activated, punched whoever opened the door in the stomach. Amethyst let out a pained groan and clutched her stomach, shapeshifting back into herself, falling on her side on the floor. Spinel got her phone out and texted Garnet to come pick her up. Seconds later, the real Garnet collected Amethyst and went back to the burning room.

* * *

Spinel was nearly finished with the board game. Amethyst's room opened up and a tall blue soggy, musty rug slowly made its way toward the door to exit the house. Inch by inch, it slowly got closer and closer. Eventually, it was right next to the door. A white hand appeared from behind the rug and grasped the soor handle. Spinel made no attempt to stop the rug as it opened the door and bumped into Garnet. She picked the rug and Pearl up and went back to the burning room with them.

* * *

Spinel had put the card game away and was now watching television. She grabbed a handful of popcorn and funneled it all into her mouth, taking a sip of lemonade after chewing and swallowing. After a moment, Pearl practically burst out of Spinel's room.

"SPINEL! **EMERGENCY**!" Pearl yelled, looking distressed.

"Huh?" Spinel began. "What? What is it, Pearl?"

"It's your room!" Pearl replied.

"What about it?" Spinel inquired.

" _Amethyst_ is in there!" Pearl bellowed.

"...Okay," Spinel responded, only half-paying attention.

"...Eating your only copy of the original Margites!" Pearl thickly lamented.

This actually did cause Spinel to get up from the television, jumping down to the lower floor. Before the pink gem could make another step, Spinel's phone notified her of a text. She took it out and read it. Spinel was now incredibly unamused and disappointed. She glared at Pearl, showing off the text on her phone.

"no shes not"  
"got her tied up in her room"

Pearl read those texts and gave a regretful smile. Her only option was to shrug. Spinel responded in kind by wrapping an arm around Pearl and tossing her into the burning room.

* * *

Spinel was back to watching television. She had nearly exhausted all the popcorn and lemonade and the current show was nearly over. Suddenly, Pearl's room opened up. Amethyst and Pearl rushed out of there, yelling. It sounded like it was akin to a war cry. A few seconds later, Garnet followed, chasing after them. Amethyst managed to open the door with Pearl following close by. Spinel sighed and turned the TV off and jumped down to the lower area. There, she snaked across the ground and out the door, following after Garnet.

After reaching the outside, Spinel turned her arms into springs and sprung up, flying into the air and landing in front of Pearl and Amethyst.

"By the stars, what's it gonna take for ya two to leave Steven alone!?" Spinel yelled, enlarging herself to gigantic proportions.

Amethyst and Pearl stopped in their tracks, looking up at the giant disgruntled Spinel.

"Spinel, calm down!" Amethyst uttered.

"Why should I?" Spinel snapped back. "Ya two have been tryin ta escape from this house all day!"

Amethyst and Pearl wordlessly stared at Spinel for a moment or two before they turned to each other.

Spinel's eyes grew wide. "... _Don't_."

Amethyst and Pearl got into poses.

"Don't ya dare," Spinel ordered.

Amethyst and Pearl then began to dance. They got closer as Spinel began to panic. Garnet stepped somewhat awkwardly to the left and closer a few steps, raising both hands into the air. Amethyst and Pearl, now holding each other, began to glow and form, enlarging. Spinel gasped a bit.

"Y-you- uh, Pearl!" Spinel began. "Amethyst's been sneaking laundry into her room and scattering it around her junk piles!"

A tremor briefly shook the ground. The large white shape that was forming shrunk and Amethyst and Pearl returned to their original forms, falling into the open hands of Garnet, who clenched them shut, trapping the two gems.

Pearl shot an annoyed glare at Amethyst and reprimanded, "Amethyst, why would you take Steven's laundry?"

Amethyst sneered a little at Spinel. "Spinel, we had an agreement you wouldn't tell! Now my project is ruined!"

"Spinel...?" Pearl began, confused. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Spinel shrugged. "Ammy said it was gonna be a game." Spinel's phone indicated a text arriving, but she had other priorities now.

"Amethyst...!" Pearl barked, shooting a disapproving glance at the purple gem.

"You two," Garnet began, "need to understand that Steven wants to do this on his own."

"Yeah!" Spinel started, shrinking down to her normal size. "This ain't gem stuff. This is human stuff. And I'm the only one who bothers with humans here! I know them. I know how they react! You honestly think the dame's gonna like it if we smothered her with all sortsa questions!? Ya don't force this stuff!"

Amethyst and Pearl looked down at the ground, ashamed and defeated.

"Come on," Garnet ordered, turning to go enter the house. "Back inside."

Spinel let loose a sigh, letting go of the frustration that had built up over the course of the day. Spinel's phone indicated that more texts were arriving. She got her phone out and looked at it. They were from... Mr. Smiley?

"Spinel help."  
"Pink ball on my rollercoaster shot into the ocean."  
"I think I saw Steven and someone else in there."  
"Please help them."

Spinel's eyes shot wide. Garnet was about to enter the house. "Garnet, _stop_!" Spinel yelled.

Garnet looked back to Spinel as she began to explain. "Mr. Smiley said he thought he saw Steven get shot inta the ocean while inside a pink bubble."

Another tremor shook the surrounding area. Garnet gently set Pearl and Amethyst onto the floor and gave Spinel her full attention.

"Garnet, we have to-" Amethyst began.

"Let Spinel talk," Garnet ordered. Amethyst shut her mouth with a frown. Pearl looked worried.

"...Pearl. Amethyst. Look at me," Spinel ordered. The two did so. Spinel crossed her arms. "This is gonna be a mission ta save Steven. No playdates. No questions. We find Steven and the girl, wherever they are, and rescue them. Then we leave back ta the house. And then, we're gonna have a round robin video game tournament. Got it?"

Amethyst and Pearl were quiet.

"Don't have Garnet make it an order," Spinel warned.

"We- we got it," Pearl stated.

Amethyst grumpily crossed her arms. "Fine. We got it."

"Good," Spinel stated.

"Let's go," Garnet ordered.

* * *

The Crystal Gems reached the fair-side pier just as it seemed to collapse. Sandy smoke spread underneath the collapsed pier.

"Steven!" The gems called out, rushing over to a nearby Steven and human girl.

Pearl glanced at the destruction, worried. "Steven, what's going on!?" she interrogated. "What did you do!?"

The human girl turned around to face the gems, stars in her eyes. "He was _INCREDIBLE_!"

Garnet walked up to the destroyed pier and saw a gem. She swiftly bubbled it and sent it to the burning room.

"Really?" Steven asked. "You mean it?"

The girl nodded excitedly, smiling from ear to ear.

Steven held up the pink ring-like object for the girl. "Here's your bracelet... again."

The girl took it, smiling gratefully. "Thanks."

Amethyst ran up to the two of them, putting a hand on Steven's shoulder. "So, are you going to introduce us?"

Pearl was hovering nearby and Steven was now blushing. "Steven was so excited to meet you," Pearl told the girl. "Right, Steven?"

Steven could only nervously nod.

Suddenly, Garnet picked Pearl up and carried her under her arm away from the two humans. "Hey! Don't mess with his funky flow."

The girl looked at Steven, confused. "Funky... flow?"

Steven groaned in embarrassment. Amethyst giggled and was about to explain before Spinel formed an arm into a fishing pile and lifted Amethyst off of the ground and away from Steven.

Amethyst looked down at Spinel with a grumpy face, Spinel only grinned and excitedly rushed after Garnet with Amethyst in tow.

"Garnet!" Spinel yelled. "Yo, Garnet! I caught myself a good one! Nearly a couple feet tall! Are ya proud of me?"

Steven facepalmed into both of his hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the biggest risk I've taken so far. Hope you enjoyed the shenanigans of this perspective flip. It was incredibly difficult for me to write this episode, so please tell me if it's any good or not.
> 
> Also of note, the card game Spinel played is based on the real-life card game called Wingspan. You should check it out. It's really fun.


End file.
